Almost daily, more new agencies list their businesses online with more personal profiles of foreign women seeking western men. Additionally, there are many agencies, such Adult Friend Finder, which do not exclusively specialize in foreign introductions but welcome membership from all countries. The numbers of are hard to really track given so many marital agencies but a smart estimate will place the number of foreign women seeking western men at anywhere from five to ten million, even taking in consideration that many of them are members of more than one agency.

Among Asian countries, women from China and the Philippines make up the majority of women seeking western men although there are also a significant number of women from Thailand as well. Among Latin American women, most women seeking foreign husbands are from Columbia. There are also many women in Central America seeking foreign husbands. In Eastern Europe, Russian women make up the bulk of all women seeking marriage to foreign men while Ukrainian women follow a very close second. Most of the women from all of these countries favor men from North America and Western Europe but many do not really have a preference.

Men from the U.S., Canada and Australia who are seeking women from abroad tend to be most interested in women from either Latin America or Asia although many are starting to shift their interest to women of the former Soviet Union. Men from Western Europe who are actively seeking wives from abroad tend to prefer women from the former Soviet Union.

The internet has only made it far easier for western men and other men living in financially prosperous countries to seek foreign wives but the trend is anything but modern. The concept of marrying a person from a far off land is almost as old as the institution of marriage itself.

Men of royal heritage and wealth in ancient Rome, Greece, Persia and Egypt were known to marry women from their conquered lands. Since men in these societies were usually allowed to have more than one wife there was often a shortage of eligible local women. Smitten by the exotic features of many foreign women many wealthy men arranged to take very young foreign wives, usually from poorer lands.

It was probably around the dawn of the 20th Century that this trend really started growing, perhaps thanks to increasingly industrialization in the U.S. and Europe which resulted in easier international travel. It was also at this time that women in the U.S. and Europe began gaining greater freedom and equality as more left home to work. This made them increasingly unsuitable for men who desired traditional, doting, stay-at-home wives. For these men, women from less undeveloped countries, especially in Latin America and Asia, were more preferable. Geographical convenience, due to limited travel at the time, also made women from Latin America more preferable for wealthy men in the U.S. who wanted women with more traditional values.

Due in part to traveling being more expensive during those days and because of the many resources which wealthy men had better access to, this trend was still confined mostly to wealthy men. Services that assisted in foreign introductions were used by mostly rich, older men who desired beautiful, exotic, younger wives with traditional family values.

It wasn’t perhaps until the post-World War II years, when the U.S. fully assumed the status of a major world power, that more and more younger men began dating and marrying foreign women. Many young U.S. troops were returning home with extra luggage in the form of beautiful women from Japan, China, the Philippines, Korea, Vietnam (then known as French Indo-China), Thailand and Cambodia. U.S. troops stationed in South America were also bringing home the most unusual yet beautiful souvenirs. Naturally, this also made their civilian brothers interested in women overseas. 

In the late-1980’s, when the Soviet Union and its Eastern European satellites began relaxing travel restrictions this now made it possible western men, who had long been curious about the beautiful women in these countries, to marry women from a part of the world that had once been all but completely shut off to them. And women from the crumbling Soviet Bloc began searching for western husbands by the droves.

And, of course, as the internet became more widely available less than a decade later, worldwide communication improved greatly, more online dating agencies were performing foreign introductions were now open for business.  

It has long been theorized by most people that most western men who seek wives from less prosperous and developed countries do so because they want wives who are less educated and easier to control and manipulate and will wait on them hand and foot. This is absolutely untrue. While marrying a woman who will be submissive to all their needs is no doubt the primary motivation for many men marrying foreign women there are other factors involved.

As I mentioned in an earlier topic, more western women are becoming afraid of commitment. Of course, a man who wants a woman who wants commitment is going to look elsewhere. Generally, women in Asia and Latin America are ready for commitment.

Most men seeking women from those parts of the world also only want a woman with traditional family values. They don’t see themselves as marrying a weak, dumb, submissive slave girl. Besides, anybody who thinks that all Asian women are passive and timid and willing to be bossed around obviously has never been anywhere in Asia.

It has also been theorized that women from these countries who are looking for western men only want to move to a more prosperous country and ditch their new husband as soon as they have an immigration visa. There are grounds for this belief as well; indeed there have many cases of brides from poorer and more repressive parts of the world who left their husbands soon after joining them. But, again, it is wrong to think that this is always the case.

For starters, one would be surprised to find that many women from Latin America and Asia really have very little desire to leave their home countries. They think of the U.S. and Europe as decadent, violent and out-of-control societies where morals have gone completely out of the window. But they search for husbands abroad because they view western men as stronger and more chivalrous towards women than the men in their own countries.

For women from the former Soviet Union, there are many factors concerning why the women there seek husbands from the west. One main factor is the still-lingering affect that World War II, which they refer to as the Great Patriotic War, had on the male population there. Of the nearly 30 million Soviet citizens who lost their lives during the war, over half were male military servicemembers. Millions more male civilians were killed. Today, the former Soviet republics of Estonia and Ukraine, which saw some of the most gruesome land battles during the war, consistently top the list of countries with the highest ratios of women to men.

Another thing to consider is that men of the former Soviet Union have among the world’s highest suicide rates. Indeed, many of the women from the Soviet Union who join marital agencies are widows, some as young as their late-20’s. The women from the former Soviet republics are attracted to western men because they view them as healthier and stronger than the men in their countries.

Another misconception from naysayers about marriages between western men and foreign women is that they don’t last very long. However, many studies have shown that marriages between western men and foreign women actually tend to last longer than marriages between western men and western women.

Obviously, western men and most foreign women are seeking the same thing – warm, stable, loving, traditional marriages.

ActionSammy,

Check out this link for a preview my upcoming book, First Degree Lust, an action/romance/mystery/thriller coming soon.

Here are more questions that people often have:

Q. Should I give the person I’m corresponding with my personal contact information?

A. Most online dating sites forbid the exchange of personal contact information and even those that allow it still discourage it. If you choose to give out any contact information an email address is the best. Phone numbers aren’t a good idea until after you’ve corresponded for a while. Giving your home address isn’t a good idea.

Q. How can tell whether the person I’m corresponding with is real or fake?

A. There is no sure-fire way to tell but some of the most common traits of someone who is just taking you for a ride are very short profiles with one or two little lines, no photos, many misspellings and grammatical errors and lots of shorthand such as “r” for “are” and “u” or “you”. When they write you their emails are very short, containing only questions and lots of shorthand. When you ask them questions, their answers are very brief with few details. They avoid answering important questions. They often favor very common, short or one-syllable names as aliases such as John, Ed, Sue or Mary.

Q. Someone I’m talking to online asked me for money. Should I send money?

A. Absolutely not! If someone asks you for money you immediately notify the agency’s customer support desk. Additionally, you should be wary of anyone who brings up the topic of money.

Q. Someone I’m talking to just asked me for my social security number. Should I give it?

A. Again, absolutely not! You should never give your social security out to anyone online.

Q. About how many online dating agencies are there?

A. There’s no way to tell. A typical search will turn up thousands.

Q. Which one is the largest?

A. Adult Friend Finder, www.adultfriendfinder.com, proudly claims more than 30 million members. Keep in mind, however, that many of these “members” no longer keep up with their membership. Most online dating agencies will not remove your profile unless you specifically ask them to and many of the members with Adult Friend Finder haven’t check their email or updated their profiles in years.

 Q. Can you find someone only for sex?

A. Yes, there are many sites out there for people looking only for sex and other erotic activity.

Q. Is it possible to find someone from another country?

A. Yes, it is. Many agencies have foreign members. Additionally, there are literally hundreds of online marital agencies that specialize in foreign introductions.

Q. How many people am I allowed to correspond with at one time?

A. Very few, if any, online dating agencies place a limit on the number of people you can correspond with at any given time although it would be a good idea to keep the number under ten.

Q. Can I have more than one profile with the same agency?

A. Some agencies allow multiple profiles but others don’t. You should check with each individual regulation. Those that do allow it generally allow no more than five profiles.

Again, this is all I have. Undoubtedly, there will be more to follow shortly.

Q. Is it safe to find a date/partner/spouse online?

A. There’s no real way to answer this question. Whether you meet at a party, church, on the job or online, there’s a risk you’re taking. Either way, you have to go with your intuition when getting to know someone. The odds of running into trouble are about the same.

Q. I’ve heard of many people meeting online but when they met in person it wasn’t the same person they saw in the picture. How do I avoid that kind of situation?

A. When getting to know someone online you should ask to see at least 3 photos of them. If at all possible, try to arrange a chat session through webcam.

Q. Aren’t all online dating agencies like matchmaking services?

A. That depends on your definition of matchmaking service. In its truest form, a matchmaking service requires you to fill out a questionnaire and bio of yourself, such as your vitals, occupation, hobbies, etc. and then the agency cross-references your information with other members to find a perfect match for you. Very few of these agencies exist. With most online dating agencies, you submit a profile and then you’re free to send and receive mail with other members yourself. There is no third-party matching in the process.

Q. Are online dating agencies expensive to join?

 A. It depends. Some are absolutely free to join. Membership to most others is reasonably priced while some charge an arm and leg. It also depends on the level of membership you’re asking for.

 Q. What do mean by level of membership?

A. Typically, most agencies have three membership plans: Basic, which is usually free; Silver, which typically costs anywhere from $10 to $25 per month; and Gold, which is usually runs from $25 to $40 per month. Some even have a Platinum level which can be over $50 per month.

Q. So, why not just opt for the free Basic membership?

A. Because with most agencies, Basic membership only allows you to post and browse other profiles but you can not initiate contact and most of their other services are either off-limits or restricted although you can still receive email. With some agencies, having merely Basic membership doesn’t even allow you to read incoming email.

Q. Is it easy to find a lover online?

    A. Your success will depend on many factors. First of all, women generally receive far more email than men. It can also depend on the agencies membership, how well you profile looks and the kind of person you’re searching for.

8. Q. How should I fill out my profile?

 A. Be very descriptive about yourself but avoid making the description too long. It’s kind of tricky here. If it’s too long, no one will want to read and if it’s too short no one will bother contacting you. List only a few of your hobbies and interests, just enough to give the give the reader an idea of your lifestyle.

9. Q Should I indicate how much money I make and what kind of job I have?

A. With most agencies, when you fill out the required information on your profile, you are prompted to list your occupation, degrees, income, marital status, etc. It is usually optional, however.

Q. I found someone whose profile I like and I want to get to know this person. What should I say in my email?

 A. Introduce yourself. Tell the person your name and a little about yourself. Tell him/her what you do for a living. Talk about some, but not all of, your hobbies and interests and places you’ve been.

That’s about all I can think of now. I’ll write more FAQ’s later on.

Of course, personal ads and marital agencies are far from being a modern concept. In fact, it could be argued that these avenues of finding love draw their roots from the millennia-old custom of arranged marriages which is still in use in many parts of the world. They’re all essentially forms of blind-dating, meeting a potential partner through a third party. And the wealthy and privileged, often too occupied with far more pressing concerns to venture out and find someone on their own, have been utilizing newspaper personal ads and matchmaking services since the latter half of the 1800’s. To further protect their privacy and to be more selective to prevent embarrassing public break-ups, many of the wealthy found personal ads far more preferable than meeting at social functions.

The early 20th Century also gave rise to another interesting twist to the personal ads – the so-called “mail-order bride” agencies. Like the regular personal ads before them, mail-order bride agencies were used mainly by the rich and wealthy. Acquiring a wife possessing a more traditional mindset toward marriage from poorer Latin American and Asian countries became preferable among many wealthy men who were wary of increasingly independent western women.

It wasn’t until the mid-1960’s that personal ads began developing a somewhat more mainstream appeal. More and more middle-class income-earning professionals began turning flipping to personal ads in newspapers. Nevertheless, most of society looked upon personal ads with great suspicion and even scorn. People who posted and responded to personal ads were perceived as weird and geeky people who wouldn’t dare approach someone at a party. Younger people still preferred to meet at parties and older people still preferred meeting at church. Placing the personal ads sections in the very back of newspapers was probably intended to illustrate how society views their usage.

Nevertheless, the use of personal ads continued to grow and 1970’s and 80’s saw the use of dating and matchmaking services skyrocket. This helped lead to the creation of even TV shows such as The Dating Game and Love Connection although due the adult content of these shows they were usually aired late-night on syndication which resulted in low viewership.

The arrival of the internet towards the end of the 20th Century placed even greater attention on personal ads, marital agencies and matchmaking services as these companies found another outlet to reach millions of potential clients. The quick rise in the number of internet users only made it inevitable that the use of dating services would become more popular and more acceptable. Speedy email and even speedier instant messaging brought forth greater curiosity into this intriguing way of meeting people. According to most surveys, fewer than 20% of adults submit and respond to personal ads but this number is most likely much higher. Lingering doubts and suspicions about personal ads and marital agencies makes most somewhat reluctant to admit to using them.

Widespread use of personal ads, marital agencies and matchmaking services have turned love-finding into a big business and more such agencies and outlets for personal ads have been created to cash in on the growing industry. As of this writing, there are as many as one hundred personal ad columns in newspapers and magazines and marital agencies and online dating sites catering to as many 300 million available singles and, unfortunately, married people pretending to be single.

Generally, posting a personal ad in a newspaper or local weekly magazine is free, usually up to the first 30 words. Extra space is typically 30 cents to one dollar per word depending on the newspaper or magazine. For safety reasons they typically won’t print phone numbers although they will allow email addresses. Ads usually run for a week after which you can re-submit the ad. Some newspapers and magazines, if specifically requested, will run the ad for up to four consecutive weeks.

Most major cities also have dating hotlines and telephone personals in which you call a number and listen to the personals. When you open an account with them you are given a pin number which you use whenever you wish to check and see if someone has responded to your telephone personal ad. This service is generally free although some charge as much as $2 per minute to listen to other people’s personal ads. You can find such numbers in most major newspapers and magazines in the ad section.

Many of the online dating sites very happily claim to be free but most really aren’t. True enough, they’re usually free to join and post profiles but you have to be a premium-paying member in order to respond to other people’s profiles. So, in a sense, they’re not free at all. Saying that they’re free is merely a marketing ploy.

These are some of the more popular sites for finding love:

Yahoo Personals: Membership in the millions, with hundreds of new profiles posted daily. Free to join and post a profile but must be a premium-paying member to send a response to another member. Have 1-month, 3-month and 6-month membership packages. If you do not wish to have to pay for love Yahoo also has an extensive network of chat rooms and online groups, many which focus mainly on finding that special someone, which you can join. Of course, this route isn’t very affective.

Friend Finder Network: Includes friendfinder.com, adultfriendfinder.com, seniorfriendfinder.com, asiafriendfinder.comand many other sites with a collective worldwide membership of nearly 50 million. Adultfriendfinder.com, the largest of the network, has nearly 30 million members alone. Free to become a Bronze member but other than posting a profile, you really have no privileges as a Bronze member. You can only send email to another member if that member contacts you first and you’re limited to sending only 3 emails a day. You can view, though you can not respond to, five profiles a day. Look but can’t touch! You must be a premium-paying Silver member to take advantage of more of their services or a Gold member in order to enjoy total unrestricted access to all of their services. So, free? I don’t think so! But, among the thousands of online dating services, they have one of the best customer service systems.

eHarmony.com: Everyone who watches primetime TV is familiar with this company. Commercials that feature couples telling America about how they met through eHarmony to the tunes of Natalie Cole. Essentially a matchmaking service in every since of the term, when you join eHarmony you fill out a questionnaire telling them the kind of person you are and they match you with another member “based on 29 dimensions of compatibility.”

Match.com: Believed to be the world’s largest online dating agency, boasting a worldwide membership exceeding 20 million. Like most online dating sites, it is free ONLY TO JOIN! Membership packages come 1-month, 3-month and 6-month deals. They also have excellent customer service.

Matchmaker.com: Also free to join but must be a premium-paying member in order to enjoy full benefits. Millions of members.

SinglesNet.com: One of the most popular online dating sites. Like most, it claims to be Free to join, post profiles and respond to profiles but there is no doubt a cost somewhere in enjoying full advantages

Date.com: Has thousands of profiles. Also “free” to join. One thing unique about date.com is that they offer tips for finding potential mates in the off-line world such as how to attract someone at a bar or party.

alt.com: As the largest online community for fetish personals, it is perhaps also the most notoriously-renowned source for online personals. Its million-plus membership has included the likes of John Robinson, a serial killer who used the site to lure many of his victims to their gruesome deaths as well as many other sex offenders. It is free to join though you must be a premium-paying member to have full access to the services.

Aforeignaffair.com: The largest online agency specializing in introducing western men to foreign brides, the vast majority coming from the former Soviet Union and a very sizeable number from Latin America. Has a wide range of plans you can take advantage of in meeting a prospect such as paying a monthly membership for a certain number of addresses per month, purchasing a lady’s address individually or discounted rates for the more you purchase or paying as much as $3,000 for romance tours which covers air and hotel fare to the country of your choosing and to attend large socials featuring the ladies from the agency. Has very good customer and tech support.

Craigslist.org: I on purposely saved possibly the worse source for online dating for last. Granted, Craigslist’s personals are totally free, making it perhaps the most completely unrestricted source for meeting people. Personal ads can contain up to 5,000 characters and you can post up 6 photos with almost no restrictions on the content. And if you’re very crafty with words you can post as many personal ads you like, which is often necessary since some sections add up to 50 new personal ads every hour, pushing yours further down to the bottom. But Craigslist relies almost entirely on users to watch for and erase illegal ads and many users routinely abuse this privilege and delete ads simply to eliminate competition. Since one does not need login credentials to view and respond to the more than three hundred thousand personal ads posted on the site at any given time there is no way of telling who deleted your ad. And you can forget about making a formal complaint about it or for any other problem you’re having with Craigslist – customer and tech support is virtually non-existent.

Wish you all the luck in finding that special someone! Check out the following related articles by this author: Advantages of Meeting Online, Avoiding Fake Online Correspondence, Posting a Proper Ad or Profile, Properly Responding to Personals, Safe Online Dating Tips.