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	<title>Socyberty &#187; personal gratification</title>
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		<title>Will Your Partner Cheat?</title>
		<link>http://socyberty.com/relationships/will-your-partner-cheat/</link>
		<comments>http://socyberty.com/relationships/will-your-partner-cheat/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 25 Feb 2008 07:42:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><a target="_blank" href="http://www.triond.com/users/chris587">chris587</a></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[betrayal]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cheating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cheating partner]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cheating spouse]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[flirting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[grief]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pain]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[partner]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[personal gratification]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[spouse]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[temptation]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Have you discussed, with your partner, about cheating? How you would feel? How they would feel? Maybe this could never happen - or would it?]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In most relationships, certainly in the beginning, this is just not a consideration.</p>
<p>However, as relationships age, your partner or spouse, may be tempted by &#8220;the grass is</p>
<p>greener on the other side&#8221; syndrome. When you take into consideration the stress of</p>
<p>parenthood, mortgages and the like, and you are now &#8220;grown-up&#8221;, with all the responsibilities</p>
<p>that this involves, the bubble of new love tends to deflate somewhat.</p>
<p>This is when the temptation to stray can rear its ugly head. It is a fact of life,</p>
<p>that familiarity breeds contempt, and maybe, that &#8220;first thing in the morning&#8221; look</p>
<p>has become more dishevelled, rather than tousled. Talking about these things, openly, now,</p>
<p>is a good way to lessen the possibility of the actual fact later down the line.</p>
<p>By realizing this now, you can get into the habit of healthy emotional conversation &#8211; rather</p>
<p>than finding out too late, that one or the other partner does not have the skills to</p>
<p>elaborate on their feelings. This can only deteriorate into ill-feelings, or more likely,</p>
<p>pushing one partner into regrettable actions.</p>
<p>Being cheated on is devastating, if it is not, you cannot have really cared to begin with.</p>
<p>One cannot take cheating lightly because of the pain and grief it causes both partners.</p>
<p>Betrayal, sense of self worth, and self esteem are only a small part of the negative emotional</p>
<p>results.</p>
<p>Provided your relationship is healthy, flirting with others is quite acceptable &#8211; provided you</p>
<p>don&#8217;t go overboard. Flirting should be fun, not dirty or harrassingt. A caring partner will be</p>
<p>mindful of the boundaries, and gently advise their spouse as to the limitations therein.</p>
<p>Not everyone understands the rules, though.</p>
<p>Some people are socially dislexic and just cannot</p>
<p>see the boundaries. Then again, some people are just so determined to have their own way, that</p>
<p>they do not care who is hurt, in their quest for personal gratification.</p>
<p>It takes willpower to walk away from temptations, or ones desires; to say no, to back up what</p>
<p>you say and be truly caring about your partner or spouses feelings. If your partner is not</p>
<p>particularly strong willed, back them up to make them stronger, praise the fact that they are</p>
<p>kind hearted, or caring &#8211; give them confidence in their love for you.</p>
<p>Try not to beat this subject to death, when discussing it with your partner, and remember &#8211; this</p>
<p>is a discussion, there are no right and wrong answers. Talk about how the both of you would</p>
<p>feel and what would cause the both of you to entertain any thoughts of cheating,</p>
<p>If your spouse has never considered the subject previously, they may not even be certain of</p>
<p>their own views on the matter. Take your time in this. If your force the issue, it may very</p>
<p>well seem like accusation &#8211; avoid this at all cost.</p>
<p>Would cheating be caused by something physical, like not receiving enough affection or something</p>
<p>emotional, like not feeling appreciated or loved?</p>
<p>You want facts that will help you both</p>
<p>understand what your needs are so you&#8217;ll not look elsewhere.</p>
<p>If your partner feels neglected, taken for granted, or that &#8220;you just don&#8217;t listen&#8221;, you</p>
<p>may very well already be facing problems.</p>
<p>Regardless of what anyone may say, we all seek love and need acceptance in our society and</p>
<p>this does not change once we enter relationships. When we do not feel we are getting these</p>
<p>things from the ones we love, we seek it from others!</p>
<p>Talk about cheating in relationships in general before the opportunity presents itself to either</p>
<p>of you.</p>
<p>Remember, a relationship is a partnership.&nbsp;</p>
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