Wynona is just one of many seniors who finds themselves at the mercy of others in their senior years. That same day another friend told me of her visit to another nursing home in Ohio.  She was visiting a friend who had early Alzheimers.  When she went home she told her husband, “Kill me!”  He looked at her and asked what the problem was.  She explained that she never wanted to live in the condition that she witnessed– patients tied in wheelchairs, paients with their heads down drooling at the mouth.  She found one patient with her head immersed in a puddle of saliva sitting at a table  sound asleep.  She gently went over to the woman, cleaned her face and padded the table with paper towels under her chin.  That was all she could do. 

  You’ve heard it, and I’ve heard it, but when the time for us to experience such treatment, it comes closer to home.  Seniors must brace themselves for what is sometims called the inevitable.  When family and friends can no longer care for you at home, or no longer want to  care for you, many families will put you into a nursing home facility.  Here are just a few things you can do before this happens to you: 

1. Make it known to your family which nursing home you would prefer.  Visit a few while you can.  Write down at least 3 choices.  Of course nursing homes do change, go out of business, or newer ones may be established.  Your list, however, will help your family to make a wiser decision as to where to place you should they have to make that decision.  You may also be moved to another city or town.  Your list, however, will still give your family a clue about your choice of nursing home options.  Choose a nursing home which is clean, and orderly.  Observe the nurses and aides.  Go into the cafeteria and observe the quality of food served.  Ask questions and keep notes.  Compare prices and plans for payment.
2. Alert  your family to bring only a few nice pieces of clothing to the nursing home for you, being sure to mark your name on each item.  Nursing home workers are known to steal patients’ clothing, especially if the clothing is expensive.  Ask your family to visit you frequently to see if your clothing is being worn by you, and not others in that facility. 
3. Make sure that you have recorded a registered will.  If the nursing home asks to take all of your assets and property, quit claim deed your property over to a close family member and decide who will be your executor of your will and who will have the power of attorney.  Make sure this is done in a legal manner. 
4. Don’t be afraid to speak up in a nursing home.  Patients have rights, whether they know it or not.  in most nursing homes,  patients are not called patients. They are called consumers, clients, or other names.  They are still patients in any category.  Many patients do not know their rights and their rights are often violated.  So speak up clearly.  Tell your family members of any abuses you are suffering. 
5. Have your family members check your body at least twice a month for any bruises or sores.  Some nursing home staff members are abusive and do not want the family members to discover the wounds or sores that are a direct result of abuse or neglect.  If family members come frequently and check their loved ones, these abuses can be quickly reported. 
6. In cases where family members are not able, willing, or live near enough to you to visit you often, ask your friends to be there for you.  Do not feel that you will be a burden to them.  This is a time when you need them as never before. 
7. Some nursing homes keep their patients heavily sedated.  These patients have a blank stare and respond like zoombies.  In written statements, request that you not be heavily sedated constantly. 
8. Be willing to move to a better nursing home facility if the one you are in proves to be negligent in its duties.    Because most nursing home facilities receive local, state and federal funding, you should have a choice to be moved.  Never settle for ill treatment.  Check on your rights to be relocated before you are ever admitted to a nursing home. 

   The nursing home delimna is just one of the problems seniors will incur as they grow older.  Today, many seniors are choosing to stay in their own homes as long as possible. Assisted living homes are cropping up everywhere.  These homes allow for a certain amount of independence and privacy, however, nursing homes are available for those who cannot do for themselves.  We never know how our lives will begin to eclipse, but we can prepare for the worst while we have a clear mind.  Preparing using a few of the simple suggestions above will make it easier for you should your family have to make this tough decision for you.