There’s plenty of lying going on online when it comes to dating and finding someone to have that perfect relationship with.  A study conducted at the University of Wisconsin-Madison showed just how much and what can be done about it

The researchers have identified clues as to whether the author was lying or not. They compared the height, weight and age of 78 online daters to the information posted on their online information and photos on four matchmaking websites. Then the researchers conducted a linguistic analysis of the volunteer’s written self-descriptions to reveal patterns that constitute a high probability that the person was lying.

It’s All About “I”

For example, the more deceptive a dater’s profile, the less likely they were to use the first-person pronoun “I.”

“Liars do this because they want to distance themselves from their deceptive statements,” say the researchers.

The liars often employed ‘negation,’ a flip of the language that would restate “happy” as “not sad” or “exciting” as “not boring.” And the liars tended to write shorter self-descriptions in their profiles — a way to evade the truth, or not getting caught by weaving a more tangled web of deception in a longer description. The less they write, say the researchers, the fewer untrue things they may have to remember and support later.

Daters who had lied about their age, height or weight or had included a photo the researchers found to be less than representative of reality, were likely to avoid discussing their appearance in their written descriptions, choosing instead to talk about work or life achievements.

80 Percent Are Lying

In a second part of the study, the researchers asked volunteers to judge the daters’ trustworthiness based only on the written self-descriptions posted on their online profiles. About 80 percent of the 78 profiles in the study lied to some degree.

Weight was the most frequent transgression, with women off by an average of 8.5 pounds and men missing by 1.5 pounds on average. Half lied about their height, and nearly 20 percent changed their age.

The researchers point out that dating online is very different from a face-to-face meeting for several interesting reasons. For example, in online dating, the back-and-forth of an in-person conversation is missing, giving a liar the opportunity to respond at their leisure or not at all. And it’s editable, so the first telling of the story can come out exactly like the profile-writer would like.

The researchers suggest that some day there may be computer software that will tell how likely a potential online dating partner is to be lying, or shading the truth. Until then, it’s still “buyer beware.”

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If you want to know who has more sex appeal, there’s a new study that will provide you with the inside scoop on which social network delivers the goods. Twitter wins by a landslide.

The survey showed that online dating has become the place to hang out if you’re trying to find the love of your life.  Almost half (49 percent) of the people surveyed know someone whose relationship started with online interactions. Four in 10 admit to having flirted with someone online; a quarter of those surveyed say they’ve experienced strong feelings of attraction for someone on the Internet; and around 1 in 5 (19 percent—and 22 percent of those aged 18-34) say they’ve actually had a romantic, sexual, or erotic relationship online.

Image via CrunchBase
Twitter Wins

When compared to Facebook users, Twitter users are hands down when it come to their sexiness.

•   40 percent of daily Twitter users describe themselves as “sexy,” compared with just 28 percent of people who use Facebook every day.

• 42 percent of active tweeters (vs. 33 percent of active Facebook users) say they’re “sexually adventurous.”

•  33 percent of tweeters (vs. 28 percent of Facebookers) pride themselves on being “skilled lovers.”

• When asked whether they would choose to have only sex or only romance for the rest of their lives, tweeters were significantly more likely to choose sex: 41 percent vs. 33 percent of Facebook users.

• 55 percent of tweeters vs. 46 percent of Facebookers have sex at least once a week.

•  21 percent of tweeters vs. 14 of Facebookers sometimes worry that their sexual fantasies and behaviors aren’t “normal.”

•  14 percent of tweeters vs. 9 percent of Facebook users admit that sex—or thinking about sex—sometimes interferes with their jobs.

The Politics of Sexiness and Social Networks

It’s an election year in the U.S. (2012) so what better time to determine which party is the sexiest? The survey says if you want to have an adventurous sex life, date a Democrat.

•  34 percent of respondents living in Blue States describe themselves as “sexually adventurous,” compared with only around a quarter (26 percent) of Red State-ers.

•  27 percent of Reds vs. just 17 percent of Blues believe it’s wrong to have sex prior to marriage.

•   Is purple the color of romance? If they could have only one for the rest of their lives, 32 percent of Reds and 37 percent of Blues, compared with just 28 percent of people living in Purple States (swing states, leaning neither strongly Democrat nor Republican) chose sex over romance. Nearly three-quarters of Purples (72 percent) vs. 68 percent of Reds and 63 percent of Blues chose a lifetime of romance instead.

•   Reds are significantly less tolerant of homosexuality—though this has become a minority viewpoint even in Republican-leaning states: 39 percent of Reds vs. just 29 percent of Blues believe it is wrong to engage in homosexual sex.

If You Could Choose Only One Partner …

The survey went deep into the American psyche to find out more about how Americans think about their sex lives and what choices they would make if they could only choose one thing with respect to their love life.

•  68 percent of Americans would prefer to have a partner who’s unattractive but great in bed rather than the reverse.

•  If they could only choose one for the rest of their lives, 47 percent of men and 19 percent of women would choose sex; 53 percent of men and 81 percent of women would opt for romance instead.

•  16 percent of millennials have dumped someone via text message.

•  1 in 5 millennials (19 percent) has posed for nude photos or taken nude photos of their partner, and 30 percent have received via mobile phone a naked picture of someone they know (“sexting”).

•  A quarter of the American men (24 percent) worry they’re not very good in bed.

•  Want more sex? Go northeast, young men (and women): 28 percent of respondents who live in the northeastern United States have sex several times a week or just about every day, compared with 20 percent in each of the other regions (Central, South, West). Moreover, just 12 percent of people in the Northeast think it’s wrong to have sex prior to marriage, compared with 20 percent or more in each of the other regions.

Is Online Dating Cheating?

The survey found that the effects of interactions online are beginning to spill over into offline lives as more people spend more time on social media sites:

•  73 percent of Americans believe having a strongly sexual relationship with someone online counts as cheating.

•   Around a third (32 percent) know someone whose offline relationship ended because of his or her actions online. The number rises to 39 percent among the 18-34 cohort (millennials).

• 69 percent say the Internet has made it easier for people to cheat on their partners.

• 35 percent acknowledge that relationships online can prove too much of a distraction to offline relationships.

• 11 percent of women and 18 percent of millennials admit to having “stalked” an ex on social media networks.

•  And around a third of men (31 percent) and 14 percent of women say images online have actually influenced how they think about sex.

If the study provides any lasting, useful information it may be that we all need to put down our phones, step away from our computers and spend a little more time outdoors, socializing with people face-to-face.

You’ll have to excuse me now – I’ve got to check my iPhone.

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Love is a wonderful gift .It’s a present so precious words can barely begin to describe it.

Love is a feeling , the deepest and sweetest of all.It’s incredibly strong and amazingly gentle at the very same time.

It is a blessing that should be counted every day.It is nourishment for the soul.

It is devotion , constantly letting each person know how supportive its certainty can be.

Love is a heart filled with affection for the most important person in your life.

Love is looking at the special someone who makes your world go around and absolutely loving what you see.

Love gives meaning to one’s world and magic to a million hopes and dreams.

It makes the morning shine more brightly and each season seem like it’s the nicest one anyone ever had.

Love is an invaluable bond that enriches every good thing in life.It gives each hug a tenderness,

each heart a happiness , each spirit a steady lift.

Love is an invisible connection that is exquisitely felt by those who know the joy ,feel the warmth , share the sweetness , and celebrate the gift.

The name of the game is “keep him guessing about your intentions until desperation sets in”. the lady will send mixed signals whose intent is to confuse while the man keeps hoping she will relent and yield to his advances. One love token will follow another one with changes in variety as he falls all over himself to please her. All advances will be kept at bay.

The lady fears that letting down her guard will make her appear cheap in the man’s eyes. The assumption is that men are usually excited like animals when relentlessly chasing prey around to exhaustion.

When the chase is kept up for too long, many men tend to give up and lean more towards those who have an ear and a soft spot for them. Worse still, a more attractive catch may come sauntering along. This is the time her game is lost, never to attract that man’s attention again.

Women have been disappointed for many years in their use of this strategy and yet they still employ it despite the chances of losing the precious hunter who bears the ultimate trophy.  

This is the kind of stuff soap operas are made of. Ladies seem to love this kind of story line. Crisis situations that may be factual or otherwise often sound like: Please come quick. I’ve been robbed. I lost my purse and need your help. My car won’t start. I’ve sprained my leg. Can you fix my kitchen sink? I had too much to drink.I could use your height in fixing my bathroom lights. My boyfriend has jilted me, with a hope of getting a shoulder to lean on.

Immediately the man shows up, the lady feigns a sense of loss that attracts sympathy from the man, but quickly recovers after the man has administered his services. A romantic reward shrouded with gratitude follows thereafter with the promise of a lengthy affair. All ends well that started badly as the two live happily thereafter.

Ladies employ this strategy in a subtle but matter of fact way that often looks convincing to the man. Few men see through the trick.

Many people could probably write a book on how many times they have been challenged to forgive someone 

Anyone that wrongs a persons needs  forgiveness a stranger pushed me and beat me up of course I’m angry and at first probably want revenge that is the natural feeling for most of us

How we are able to choose to deal with our situations the sooner our feelings are dealt with the sooner to our Forgiveness appears the anger and bitterness go away 

For many of us this is hard to do controlling feelings emotions 

True Forgiveness strengthens character, calms emotion,conquers hate,

hate destroys all 

Thinking of the past is a that holds forgiveness back,constantly dealing with those kinds of emotions keeps the resentment alive 

Many people try to deal with their emotions on their own and prolong their Forgiveness Help is available on line could be the most comfortable way 

 Needing Help may be hard to accept It is great knowing their are places to contact Help Guide can assist 

You should be looking at them everyday and remembering that you love them. Remembering why you feel in love.

Make time to cuddle up, talk a walk on the beach, sit at the dinner table, watch a movie together and just talk to one another.

Hold each others hands. Say good by and hello. Ask how was your day and LISTEN to the answer.

I didn’t get married to continue to do the things I did when I was single. We got married because we wanted to spend time together. 

We got to the beach , movies, walks, gym and just hang out. Sometimes we just talk and we still laugh with each other. We actually not only love one another we like each other.

Sometimes people get so caught up in their lives they forget to do small things. When your partner comes home ask them how was their day, then stop and listen.

When you make dinner turn off the TV, sit at the table together and talk to each other. Put away the mail, phones and other distractions and just talk to each other.

When it is time for bed you don’t have to shower alone. Save water and time, do it together. 

Have fun again. Grow older together not old. Learn to laugh again. Learn new things together.

The lil things that irritate you..let them go, for those will be the lil things that make you smile, when they leave this world. And remember there are the lil things you do that they also deal with and never say a word.

Love is give and take. It takes a lot of patience. It takes a lot laughter inside. When you learn to laugh at the little things it makes them seem unimportant. You learn to not make crisis out of everything.

You learn to not let your feelings take over. So what they forgot to put the top on the toothpaste. So what they didnt replace the roll of toilet paper? So what the trash can needs emptying? DO IT! It should not cause feelings. It should not be a crisis.

If the person isn’t cheating, beating, stealing or calling you names is it worth the drama? Are you bringing in old stuff from your own past?

Look over at your partner….Do you still love them? Do you still want that life you dream of? Then go get it.

Don’t let your friends or no one else come before them. Stop living HERE on the computer. Go do it with THEM. Do it in REAL life.

Folks grabbing that real hand, seeing that real smile, hearing that real voice and hugging that real person….THAT is real!!!!!

Now go get that love you want……Let go of the past….Fight for your future….

So deal with the present….That is what is in front of you right now….

So make Valentines day everyday…..

OK, so if you agree you need to do something different this time, this is our top ten of romantic gestures for Valentine’s:

• 1. Write him or her a love poem. The point is, it doesn’t have to be really good (though we hear Shakespeare enjoyed a very active love life), it just has to be written from the heart, especially for him or her from you.
• 2. Cook a special dinner and, when he or she walks in from work, let them find a special Valentine’s menu pinned on the wall by the front door, just like you’d find outside a really cool restaurant;
• 3. Print a picture of the two of you. Don’t just leave those wonderful holiday snaps on your camera or computer like we all do, after a bit of photoshop work on a picture of the two of you, print it off and put it in a nice frame for him/her;
• 4. Book her/him a spa day at a local hotel for that ultimate pampering experience;
• 5. Leave dozens of ‘I love you’ notes around the house in places you know she/he will find them;
• 6. If you decide to buy him/her a special little gift for Valentine’s, such as a piece of jewellery or a watch, put it in the box of their favourite breakfast cereal so they shake out the surprise into their bowl in the morning;
• 7. Do you have a special ‘our song’? Serenade her/him with it. This could be on the phone to where she/he works, at the front door just after ringing the bell or from the garden up to the bedroom window. Use your imagination!
• 8. Take him/her out on a surprise mystery trip; it could be for a walk in the country, a nice meal or maybe just a movie;
• 9. The night before Valentine’s, put an ‘I love you’ banner on the roadside on the way he/she drives to work;
• 10. Set up a surprise home massage parlour. Get the table, the oils, the towels and the robe all ready and promise him or her the best massage in town!

Well then, what are doing still sitting here looking at your screen when you should only have eyes for your loved one?

You do really dig her, though, and you want to impress her, and give her something really cool, something that might even make her squeal with delight, because hey, it is Valentine’s Day and romance can be pretty damned cool, and she’s cute when she squeals with delight. So what can you do that’s the right amount of “You’re pretty wonderful” and “It’s not a ring, stop visualizing bridesmaid dresses” , you’re wondering?

Now, you could, if you have a chance, sneak around in her home dressed all in black like a ninja, doing things such as, say, checking out perfume bottles, sizes of lingerie and shoes, jotting down the names from the sides of saved shopping bags out of the closet and so forth… but, these things take time, not to mention they are very risky activities that one cannot partake in during the fragile beginnings of a relationship, lest one be branded a dangerous stalker. And once you are branded a Dangerous Stalker, well, it makes it harder to get reservations for that Valentine’s Night dinner. Something about “Two for Dangerous Stalker” is off-putting to most fine dining establishments, though no one quite knows why.

So to save you this trauma, I am here to help. Let’s begin, shall we?

♥Buy her costume jewelry. Something cute and sweet. But be sure to include some chocolates. For balance. Cause that way it will take her mind off the fact that she didn’t just get a diamond.

♥You don’t know her sizes, but you want to get her lingerie. Is she tall, petite? Slender, curvy? Stacked, not so stacked? Tell the salesperson. If her breasts can fit in the palm of your hand, she’s probably an A cup. If she overflows just a bit, probably a B. If she’s a good handful, she’s a C. And if you have to spread your fingers to hang on and you still don’t have full coverage, that’s a D. (If anyone can explain this in a more efficient way, feel free to write in and correct me. I figured that you’d enjoy visualizing this more than fruit, however.) I have to say, though, as with most other things on the list, the path of least resistance is the ever popular gift card. Get her one from Amazon and she can choose from tons of different lingerie retailers. But make sure you mark down that the gift card is for lingerie, lest it be spent on 

♥With stockings, generally petite through 5′9″ is one size. 5′10″ and up is Tall.  5′7″ or so and 190lbs or more is Queen (or roundabouts there I think, I’m taking a guess, I know it’s a lot larger and goes up higher, that number is a low point).

♥Perfume: A few perfumes that you cannot go wrong with – Most women will adore the smell of Issey Miyake’s L’eau D’Issey Eau D’Parfum. It has a nice blend of florals along with an undertone of light woods. It is beautiful and smells very elegant and luxurious. She will feel like a princess. Issey Miyake makes a Florale one also that is wonderful. Either of these will make your gal feel incredibly special. If she is in her early twenties or so, Juicy Couture’s original fragrance is a great choice as well. Another favorite of the young set is Davidoff’s Cool Water for women. And if you really want to be romantic, you can get her Creed’s Love in Black, which was originally developed exclusively for Jackie Onassis. (But you have to be sure to tell her the tale – and why not get her a Chanel suit and pillbox hat while you’re at it?

♥Shoes: Never try to guess a lady’s shoe size. Shoes run so differently, and an ill-fitting shoe can cause serious foot problems down the road. Better: Give your gal a beautiful box of handmade chocolates (check Etsy for some amazing sellers – some may be able to overnight their wares!) or in a pinch some Godiva or Ghiradelli from the mall, and tuck a gift card to DSW in the box. She can pick out her own shoes, and try them on first to make sure they are a perfect fit. And you know the old saying, “Give a woman shoes, and you have a friend for life.” Wait, that’s not an old saying? Well, it certainly should be.

♥Other gifts of luxury: Consider things like spa days, day cruises, mani-pedi gift certificates, his & hers massage dates, hair salon gift cards (careful with that one – don’t give her just a hair cut or “get your roots done” card, or your gift may backfire on your and you’ll have a mighty offended girl on your hands – and the amount of offense increases exponentially with the amount of candy that the holiday is associated with, so yep, that’s a lot of offense. Walk softly and carry a well-stocked gift card. Again, tucked inside a gift box of (her favorite kind) of chocolates would be really good. (Does she like milk chocolate? Have you heard her wax rhapsodic about white chocolate? When she gets it for herself, what does she get? Assuming you’ve seen her do this. Just a simple thing like knowing what kind of chocolate is her favorite can score major “This guy is incredible and deserves (fill in the naughty blank)” points. Though of course that’s not why you’re giving gifts. But you wouldn’t cry, would you?

Hopefully this has given you some ideas you wouldn’t have had otherwise, and you’ve got enough love ammo to cook up an idyllic day of gift-giving that will enhance your budding relationship with that special female with whom Cupid has graced you.

Happy Valentine’s Day! ♥

There is really no conscious control over who we fall in love with. It is not something that we have complete control and power over. There is certain chemistry within our bodies and signals that are given off by our brains. It is something that is subconsciously occurring and out of our control.

So, no matter how many times you read your company handbook and find that you are not supposed to have a relationship with anyone at work, if you are truly attracted to someone that you work with, you are not going to be able to fight that attraction.

So, what do you do if you find that you want to date a co-worker? First of all, you have to make a decision between the two of you. Talk with the co-worker. Chances are they have given off some sort of signal or vibe that has made you take notice of them. This is more than likely a mutual attraction. It is possible to make a relationship with a co-worker work well for both of you. It is also possible in some circumstances to maintain this relationship without reprimand or repercussions. You just have to be smart and sensible about what you are doing.

If you find yourself starting a relationship with a co-worker, the worst thing that you can do is try to hide it. This will have serious consequences in the end when people find out about it, which they always do. Be open and honest. Talk with your boss about what is going on. In most cases, if you go to them and you are completely honest, there are ways that they can make it work for you. However, if you hide the relationship and your boss finds out later, you could find yourself out of a job and in a bad situation.

You should also talk openly with your partner. Make sure that you both understand that your relationship does not affect your work. You cannot play favorites or change the way that you work because of this new relationship. Keep in mind that at work, everything is to remain the same.

If your partner is higher up than you and is required to reprimand you for something that you have done wrong relating to work, they need to be able to do that without bias. If your relationship starts interfering with your work, you need to take a serious look at everything that is involved and find out where you can make changes.

In some cases, one party in a relationship will choose to leave their job. This is often a personal decision and not one that they are forced into by their employer. They do not want to have a relationship with someone that they work with every day. If the relationship is that important to them, they may very well be willing to find a new job to maintain that relationship and make it as good as they possibly can.