Wait, didn’t I just say that this should be over with by the age of 4 months?  Then what is SUDS, also known as SUNDS?  SUDS is sudden unexpected death syndrome, SUNDS is sudden unexpected nocturnal death syndrome.  Same thing, one more word.  This is defined as a sudden unexpected death of adolescents and adults during sleep!!  SUDS was first noted in 1977!  Some believe that SUDS is superstitious.  They believe that it’s only a heart attack.  Believers say that victims have frightening nightmares that continue to haunt the victim, until finally they are scared to death!  Once they are frightened so terribly, they have a cardiac arrhythmia and die!!  The only way one can survive this attack is if they can get their heart to slow down and go back to it’s normal beat before the heart stops beating all together. 

It is believed that it is an evil spirit that haunts ones dreams, sits on its victims chest, and squeezes it!  

Wow.. what a way to die!!  You think with the world the way it is, the safest place for you to be is at home, snuggled up in your bed.  Think again!

I would like to start off by reading you a poem, that she inspired in me to let you know that I am here as an equal to you and not someone asked to speak, that merely wants to inspire you from words spoken from my heart, but from words felt from the depth of my soul.

It’s been 5 years since you left. Doesn’t seem that long since I wept. I spent long nights that would never end, each breath that I took was just pretend. I went through the motions of each day, I pretended things were normal and life was okay. What I failed to mention was my heart was broken and the tears were ready with each word spoken. I could only remember the smell of your hair. The softness of your fingers and dream of you there. I imagine you five now & bouncing around, I picture your face, yet there is no sound. No curls, no giggles, or ribbons to tie. No cartwheels, or backbends, it must be a lie! No; I must be strong and accept this fate. God has chosen you, and for us you await. God so loved you, he took you so quick, he needed a Rosebud, and so you were picked! So rejoice my young Angel, and prepare us a home, we will be there someday, You are Never Alone!

That having been said, let me tell you why I am here. I am here not in memory of a loss, but in celebration of a life. Though it was brief, only 2 and ½ months, Kyli brought to us the belief in Angels on earth, and small miracles.

As a child of my parents, and mother of my own children I understand the pains, fears, joys, and miracles that come with the whole package.

A life no matter the brevity of it IS precious. Some parents have the privilege of getting to spend precious years before the loss of their child, some only moments in the womb. All moments count! This is what we all gathered here tonight have learned and share.

The reason I call it a celebration of life rather than a memory of death is: that we must take out the human equation of our first response to hold on to the pain and agony of the moment of the loss & remember what we keep in our hearts and what we now apply to our everyday lives.

1. We now take that extra moment to hug those we love one extra time before they leave.
2. We now say we love you more often when we hang up the phone.
3. We now know that pictures count more than ever no matter what the age or no occasion at all.
4. We now know the little things really do matter:

Love, laughter, song, touch, and dance. The list is endless and I know each of you have items you now can add to that list that you make a point to do with your loved ones to make sure nothing is missed. It’s not that we didn’t know it before, but we now realize the urgency and the importance of not letting a moment go by that we don’t miss out a chance to do these little things with those that mean so much to us. One of my most favorite loves in the world is music & dance.

You can use them together or separately to let your heart feel free. I learned how, first when I was little, my parents would hold me as they danced together, then as I grew up, my daddy would let me stand on his boots. Than as I got older I stood on my own two feet and was told not to look down at my feet but to look up and pay attention to the music’s beat. I would look into my Daddy’s eyes and feel the love and pride he felt as I grew into the woman I am today. I was grateful for this gift as my own children grew up, I always took time to stop cleaning house, or whatever to hold them and DANCE.

And so it was the same with Kyli. My favorite memories and gift of her brief life were the moments we danced.

Thank you All Again, and may peace be with you.

But there is a serious side as well.

A year ago, they lost their baby to Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS). Instead of disappearing as most people would-an understandable reaction-they allowed the community into their lives and learn from this tragedy. Somehow they found the strength to not only carry on, but to help if and when others experience the same grief SIDS brings.

The Angelcheeks Foundation provides parents and guardians grants to those not fortunate enough to have insurance. It also provides education needed about life insurance should the unexpected ever happen to their infant. The website goes into further detail.