1. More painful menstruation or late
The results of the Harvard University, United States, women who are stressed will experience pain during your period two times worse than those who are not currently in a state of stress. According to researchers, as reported by the Prevention, this could be because stress triggers hormonal imbalances. These conditions can also make your periods late.

2. Pain in the jaw
Pain in the jaw can be a sign that you are menggertakan teeth. This usually occurs during sleep or when under pressure, and the more often when under stress. While holding the emotions, there are some people who remained silent while menggertakan teeth.

3. Pimples occur anywhere
According to Gil Yosipovitch, MD, a dermatologist from Wake Forest University, the stress increases the risk of inflammation that trigger acne in adults. These stress hormones will make acne easier to grow and not just in certain areas, but also in parts of the body that had never covered with acne.

4. Bleeding gums
According to the analysis of 14 studies, someone who is very stressful to have a higher risk of oral health problems. High stress levels can disrupt the immune system. This allows bacteria easier to attack the teeth and gums.

           According to ACA Code of Ethics (2005) section A.11b Inability to Assist Clients, “If counselors determine an inability to be of professional assistance to clients, they avoid entering or continuing counseling relationships. Counselors are knowledgeable about culturally and clinically appropriate referral resources and suggest these alternatives. If clients decline the suggested referrals, counselors should discontinue the relationship.” If I could be value neutral, I will be able to grow as therapist and become a better well rounded therapist who is able to serve more people’s needs. If I could not be value neutral and fail to refer them to someone who is better equipped to serve them, I could run the risk of being reported, my reputation as a therapist will be tarnished because I lost that client’s trust.

Many emotions play on children of divorced and separated parents. Some are able to be well adjusted while some struggle coping. According to an Anonymous author (2011):

In 2003, a study by the Pennsylvania State University College of Medicine called An Exploration on the Ramifications of Divorce on Children and Adolescents, showed life-altering impact on well-being and development. Consequences of failed relationships affect more than just the adults involved. The impact is felt on almost all aspects of a child’s life, says the study, which includes parent-child relationships, emotions and behavior, psychological development and coping skills – all of which may resurface later on once faced with major life decisions such as marriage (p. 114).

In my family’s case, my children were divided in their emotions. My oldest two were fine because they knew that they would see me every day, while my son had a difficult time with outburst in school and a refusal to talk to his own dad about his emotions and frustrations. Granted my children have autism and change is the hardest thing for autistic children.

            Root, A. (2010) believes that children from divorced parents are more likely to have emotional troubles and relationship issues with family and God.

Written from the perspective of the impact to the child and based in his own experience as a child of divorce, Root sets forth the idea that divorce affects the child at an ontological level, at the level of being. The essential parental relationship creates a sense of community for the child, and the child’s being is developed and reflected in this community. When divorce ends this community for the child, it produces existential anxiety that greatly influences the child’s ability to cope and adjust to the world. Thus, divorce is more than a difficult phase in the life of a child, but rather a type of wound with profound, long-term implications for wellbeing, adjustment, and relationships with others and with God (p.421).

            I have serious issues with his statement as I found that there are parents with strong Christian views that keep their children involved with church and still foster a healthy relationship with God. In fact, my children’s belief in God is even stronger after our separation because they went seeking the one power that can help heal their pain. The church has done an excellent job showing love to both me and my ex-wife, and our children have noticed it. They see that God still loves us no matter what. More than fifty percent of our church members are either divorced or remarried. They have shared with me that their grown children have adjusted well and still have a healthy relationship with God. I believe that if couples are able to work it out and rekindle their relationship they should do so with help of a therapist, their pastor/priest or someone who can help bridge the bonds that were broken.

 Root, A. (2010) believes that many children from divorced families lack social supports (p. 421). This may be true for some families, but children and parents that are church connected socially and spiritual will find friendships and support system that really matters. All of the men took time out of their busy schedule to sit down with my son Chris either to talk or take him to the park to play basketball. He shared things with them that he wants to share with me. Just getting it off his chest gave him the emotional strength to talk to me. He was afraid that if he told me he was disappointed in me in his eyes, I would get upset with him like his mom and I get upset with each other. I think I just needed to help him understand that although his mom and I are having issues, we both love him and his sisters very much and we will always be there for him. If parents just gave their children to speak their mom without repercussions, then I think it would foster a much better outcome for our children. We have to understand that when children are upset with the divorce process their parents are going through it is not personal and we should not take it that way.

            As a therapist, we must be open-minded when helping families navigate their way through the divorce and parenting process. When couples are in heated disagreements during divorce, some of their capacities to think clearly about what their saying in front of the children. The root cause of children being scarred over parental divorce seems to come from couples who argue, and name call in front of their children leaving poor examples for dealing with relationship issues. What my ex-wife and I did since we were unable to discuss things calmly without blowing up in front of the children was we went to an email system for a few weeks to try and cool down. We only discussed in email important issues related to our children and left the financial stuff up to our attorneys.

The premonitions are simple but important to detect mental aliment due to stress at work. Forgetting important events or dates in your life may be the start of it. At times, this is embarrassing too. Suppose, at the end of the day you end up with a blank look at your wife while being asked about the day or date. Think of the dilemma you will be facing that time. Later, you will regret forgetting your marriage anniversary and cursing yourself. You might be thinking that who would be that jerk (Please pardon my language), who would forget his marriage anniversary? But there are quite a few of us who have already been in this situation. 

Now-a-days, many of the couples are working. Embarrassment is more, when your spouse is non-working. A working partner may not mind this forgetting habit at times, but, too much of forgetfulness may surely lead to a possible conflict. Now, as we know the symptom, we should also try to find the solution and cut the root of the problem itself. A witty work schedule and a balance between work and personal life may find the answer for you. Now the question is, how to go ahead with it. Making a balance between your already heavily stressed work life and family life is not a baby-sitting job. You have to carefully work out the routine while keeping every possible points in mind so that you don’t loose out any important one. Following tips may help a bit:

• You may be working eight to eight everyday, but finding half an hour a day for your family will work as a solace for you and your family; especially those who are non-working one. 
• A fifteen minutes span of time for yourself to ease the air out can be very handy. You can take a walk or do a yoga. It will help to ease out the stress day to day.
• Don’t cease the communication channel between you and your partner.
• Little bit of sacrifice on your part will make the space more comfortable between you.
• Try to be humorous. There is no harm being funny and give some amusement to others.
• Habit of self-talking can also do a bit for you.
• Don’t miss out the chance of an outing if you get a weekend off.
• Even working partner also needs some time together and surely help you to overcome you mental anxiety.
• If you are a father then your responsibility increases. Spend some time with your children too. Children work like a buffer during stressed moments.
• Don’t try to be over cautious. Some times you have to let the life go on its on way. Your motive is important, not the result.

            Norman Bowker was never a really talkative person. He went into the war quiet and compassionate and came back the same. However, his encounters during the war did not change this attribute of his. Bowker had been with a close fellow soldier of his, Kiowa, in the “shit field” in Vietnam. When a young soldier turned on his flashlight to glance at a picture, a mortar attack struck the platoon. The men did what they could to evade the bombs. The fleet had kept every man but one, Kiowa. The soldiers combed the field, looking everywhere for Kiowa, when they finally saw his body. Norman Bowker stepped up to the body and pulled up, attempting to remove Kiowa from the deep muck. However, the smell prevented Bowker from accomplishing this task. No matter how hard he tried, he was unable to fight the foul odor of the field. Kiowa passed away in the field, and Bowker felt responsible. When he ventured home, Norman Bowker felt unable to continue where his life had left off. He drove around his town’s lake numerous times, trying to sort himself out. He then drives through his town planning on simply speaking with those he used to be close to, specifically his father. However, Bowker feels ashamed that he was unsuccessful in saving Kiowa. He senses that his father will think worse of him as he did not return home with the “Silver Star”, as his father had. After failing to save his fellow soldier, Kiowa, during the Vietnam War, Norman Bowker is unable to adjust back to his past daily life.

            Lieutenant Jimmy Cross undergoes a similar predicament to Norman Bowker’s during the Vietnam War. Cross was quite unlike the figure that most people would expect from an officer during a war. He constantly daydreaming, thinking about his lifelong love, and wishing he was back home. However, though he was not a perfect representation of a soldier, Cross was changed mentally because of the war. Since he was the commanding officer of his platoon, Jimmy Cross was in charge of keeping all of his men safe. He did all he could to keep his soldiers protected however, while taking a bathroom break, Ted Lavender, was shot and killed. Jimmy Cross was devastated by this. He knew he was able to prevent this death, had he only been paying attention; one of his men was killed due to him daydreaming about his want-to-be girlfriend. Cross burns his pictures of Martha, his lover, in memory of Lavender. He never forgets this ordeal. He believed he had let himself love this woman more than he loved his fellow soldiers. Cross returns home and does not follow what he had planned to do, which was to marry Martha. The thoughts of his dead soldiers flood the Lieutenant’s head, preventing him from returning to his normal, peaceful state after the war.

            After the Vietnam War, both Jimmy Cross and Norman Bowker change emotionally for the worse. The two are unable to cope with the knowledge that they might have been able to save one of their fellow soldier’s lives and help them when they needed it the most. Such is the case with most war veterans. The thought of killing other humans is nothing in comparison to that of losing a friend in the war. When asked if you would be able to go to and serve in a war, will decline and say that you could never be the one to take another’s life, or that you could never see a close friend die in front of your eyes?

Ways to handle and reassure your children

1                    Put your emotions on hold and talk to your children in private. Reassure them that their father loves them, and that they are not to blame.

2                    Tell them that while their father has left the house, he has not left them. He will always be their father.

3                    Tell them that they will see their father on weekends, if that is so, and perhaps also during the week. They can also call their father anytime they need to speak to him.

4                    Don’t go into the mechanics of divorce and what it means, but explain that their father won’t be staying at the house anymore.

5                    Don’t discuss their father with them in a negative way; you don’t want the kids to hate him.

6                    If their father has an addiction problem, don’t discuss it.

7                    Don’t get into the reasons why their father left. It is not their business and too much information for them.

8                    Don’t take them into your confidence and tell them what their father has done. It is not a good idea to discuss private and intimate matters with them anyway, they will feel responsible.

9                    Don’t tell them that they take after their father and are just like him; you will make them feel bad.

10                Don’t change your routine in the house. Kids are used to familiarity.

11                If you have had story-telling time an hour before bedtime, continue to do so.

12                Don’t make any child of yours the ‘man of the house’. The responsibility is too great.

To be sure, the first weeks of a separation are the hardest; not only for you, but for them. Spend extra time at night with them when you put them to bed and tell them that everything will be just as before, that their father loves them and will still come to all their activities. The care with which you guide and love your children through this trying time will make a big difference in their lives.

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When I talk with other moms about their plans in December, they are usually all about Christmas. They have cookies to bake, decorations to set up, meal plan, a house cleaning, gift buying, expectations that they will never be able to answer. Sometimes these mothers, even saying, “I can not wait for it all to be over so I can relax!”

These activities can be part of a meaning of Christmas, but if that’s all that Christmas has become for you, it may be time to reconsider the reasons for your party.

Where is the joy of the season when you are too tired to experience?

Where is the pleasure of spending time with your family and loved ones when you are too busy to sit and talk with them?

How can they be happy to give your gifts when you know you have spent more than you can pay for something

This year, instead of insisting on the holiday season and expectations of support, I invite you to focus on the blessings of Christmas.

Whatever the means of Christmas into your home, make sure that the only focal point of all your preparations and celebrations. It is easy to be distracted by unrealistic expectations, high costs of Christmas, and those things we do every year, even if we are not sure why. This year, celebrate intentionally and with purpose.

For example, in my family, Christmas is a celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ. If I can keep thought to be at the forefront of my plans, everything else in place. I stay focused throughout the season and our Christmas becomes concentrated, meaningful, relaxing, and satisfying.

This year, instead of getting entangled in the stressings holiday, take a break from deep and let you enjoy your Christmas blessings.

According to the Center for Disease Control’s National Vital Statistics Report of 2002, 50% of first marriages ended in divorce and 60% of remarriages end in divorce. With these kinds of statistics, and with all the problems and pain a couple goes through, why do people still want to get married? 

Even though marriage receives so much bad press these days, walking the aisle is still a very popular exercise. After all, it is human nature to want to feel nurtured and secure.  Getting married is still very much desired for all its promise of unconditional love and companionship.  

But marriage is so much more than just the wedding ceremony or the honeymoon.  It is more than just the intimacy and fun that every couple deserves.  Marriage is also about building a family.  Traditionally, raising children is part and parcel of a marriage partnership — a task that entails the provision of shelter, clothing, education, and love without which no child can live without. Just as couples want to feel they belong to a loving relationship, so do their children. It also goes without saying that if a marriage is broken, the children would be emotionally affected by it together with their parents. The effects of divorce on children are important to any good parent. But it’s not always easy, when a marriage is struggling and someone is hurting, parents should also consider what the specific effects of divorce will be on their children. 

There have been many specific studies focusing on the effects of divorce on children. Studies show that children from a broken family are emotionally affected by the marriage breakup and they know that nothing will ever be the same again. They fear change. Not just that the mother or their father will not be around, but they may also lost contact with their extended family, or school routines may change.

Children have a fear of being abandoned. When parents are at odds and are either separated or considering separation, children have a realistic fear that if they lose one parent, they may lose the other. The concept of being alone in the world is a very frightening thing for a child.

Children who have a natural attachment to their parents also fear losing other secure relationships such as those they have with their friends, pets, siblings, neighbors, and so on. Sometimes children are simply attached to their surroundings, and moving into new surroundings can cause an understandable negative reaction. Divorce has also been found to be associated with a higher incidence of depression; withdrawal from friends and family; aggressive, impulsive, or hyperactive behavior; and either withdrawing from participation in the classroom or becoming disruptive.

Academically, children are greatly affected because of their parents divorce or separation. Children from divorced families drop out of school at twice the rate compared with children from “intact” families. They also have lower rates of graduation from high school and college. Children from divorced homes performed more poorly in reading, spelling and math.

Moreover, children of divorced parents are more likely to become delinquent by age 15, regardless of when the divorce took place. Anecdotal evidence points out that parental divorce and living in a single-parent household can influence a person to have thoughts of committing suicide.  Drug use in children is lowest among those children who have been spared from the effects of parental divorce.

Even if there are have been tension and problems at home, some children will be shocked to learn that their parents are getting a divorce.  It may take some time for them to acknowledge and accept that their lives will be different. To help a child cope with shock and stress, parents should be patient with them,  ease into the new routines and living situations if possible and constantly express and reassure their love to them. Based on research, these are the top five reasons why people get married:

1. To signify a life-long commitment 

2. To make a public commitment

3. To legalize their partnership or for financial security 

4. To formalize their partnership as part of religious belief

5. To provide security for children. 

But long after the celebration of the wedding and years after the honeymoon, when reality sets in, many marriages fail to survive.  Despite all the happiness and joy that was shared between the man and the woman during the early years of marriage, they end up separated or divorced — placing their children’s security, health, and well-being at serious risk.

The Taliban cuts off the arms and legs of their own people for listening to music they don’t approve of, for sending girls to school, they cut off the heads of women who are raped, They hang heads over bridges as a warning to subjects to follow their religious rules. These enemies are such as we have no experience with. These marines do. They know who their enemies are and what they are capable of. Is it up to us to pass judgment on our forces? We send them far from home to fight for us. Remember these marines are kids not criminals.

The White House is embarrassed. Newspapers and TV programs are moaning about the damage to the reputation of the U.S.. Your average citizen is sitting at home safe and sound without the stress and horror of war. They wouldn’t have done what these marines did. Nor would the marines without the stress of being harassed by the Taliban. We must remember these marines and all our military are in a situation where the rules are different. And not all wounds are visible. The wounds the military carries will be with then for years and maybe forever. We cannot put ourselves in their shoes. It’s not our place to judge them. War maims the body and soul.

One Vietnam soldier remembers what it is to see your own foot rot off. He remembers how it feels seeing children running up to you who are rigged to explode. He knows how it is to hear the sound of a helicopter and flash from the city to the Vietnam jungles. He can tell you about cutting the ears off dead men to wear as necklaces. How it is to crave death but be too scared to commit suicide. Our military could tell you unbelievable horrors but they wont. They will suffer nightmares and live it over and over again. Some come out maimed in body and soul for life. They pay for doing their duty for a country that doesn’t seem grateful enough for their sacrifice.

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Ruby’s Articles:

http://socyberty.com/history/women-airforce-service-pilots-of-world-war11/

http://socyberty.com/military/general-stanley-mcchrystal-and-afghanistan/

http://newsflavor.com/world/usa-canada/vietnam-vet-honored/

http://socyberty.com/military/the-role-of-women-in-the-military/

http://socyberty.com/history/disgruntled-military-retirees-fight-for-commissary/

SEX CAN REDUCE STRESS

Stress that appears usually occurs if there is a claimed botheration or even a job? Are you now the centermost is difficult to be able to adore life? So how to cope with accent can accept sex with your accomplice your wife or husband.

How can sex be able to cope with the accent that you feel today? This cardboard will accommodate an overview and aswell offers a able way to advance your female and your accomplice desire.

- Breathing. You can try to breathe deeply. This will accomplish you feel added calm. Breath can be to cope with the accent that you face today. The after-effects of accomplishing this breath could not be apparent in a abbreviate time. By accomplishing a approved basis, you’ll acquisition something bigger to abate tensions.

- Sports. Apparently Sex can be acclimated as an agitative exercise. Because your physique will diaphoresis if accepting sex. This is the aforementioned as you are of concrete exercise in the gym to bake calories.

All will depend on you, the added you aflame again the calories austere will aswell be added and more.

- Mutual support. There should aswell agenda that the bedmate and wife who feels beneath affectionate relationship, it could advance to college accent levels than those who accept a accustomed affectionate relationship.

The accord of animal action with the administration of accent is due to the adjacency emosiaonal that will advance bloom and best life.

- Touches. Several studies advance a hotlink amid accent administration techniques with a blow of the skin. That is by way of affecting and getting affected with a accomplice or even a lick during action to actualize a added advantageous emotion.

- Endorphins. Action can be demanding because of biologic absolution endorphins hirmin. This hormone is acclimated in life, because it will accompany a faculty of comfort, amusement and happiness.

It is adverse that accent can abate your sex drive or libido. But you do not charge to anguish because we accommodate the afterward tips to mengkatkan your animal arousal.

- Advantageous food. Eating advantageous foods will balance claret amoroso levels to abate stress.

- Listening to bendable music. Besides advantageous for advocacy the allowed system, music can aswell be acclimated to abate accent and actualize animal arousal.

- Lighting. This is carefully affiliated with a adventurous atmosphere to accommodate a adequate ablaze to abate stress.

- Affectionate conversation. Charge a acquaintance in authoritative a advantageous life. Affectionate conversations will abate your accent and aswell to strengthen the band of your relationship.

Poor security systems

Workplace violence that originates from outside the organization is often due to poor security systems. Workplaces are targets for criminals a thieves and without a sound security system employees will be targets for criminals. They may experience physical and verbal violence even risking life while on the job. The violence stems from outside greed that seeks to own resources the employee is tending.

Personal issues

It is said that you should leave your personal life outside of the workplace. That is sometimes easier said than done. No matter how hard one tries, emotional issues are carried with a person everywhere they go. It can become difficult to juggle the personal issues with job responsibilities.

Conflicting personalities

Some people simply cannot get along. Personalities may clash and in some cases, they may end up acting out violently toward each other. It is sad to say it, but sometimes people just do not like each other, for no apparent reason. This is not a reason for abuse, but it does happen.

Lack of control on management

Workplace violence that stems from a manager wielding power over juniors often arises from lack of proper controls on management. Positions of power need to be monitored and scrutinized to ensure that power is not abused. Lack of scrutiny and no system of accountability for managers stimulates violence towards juniors. The violence arises from positions of power being abused.

Stress

Many jobs can be extremely stressful and take a toll on employees. Tempers flare and people can over react to even the smallest thing. When faced with deadlines, multiple projects/duties and cranky clients/customers every time you go to work, it is easy to see how quickly stress can build. When a person does not have a proper outlet to release their stress, they can snap, so to speak.

Understanding some of the main sources of violence in the workplace – internal and external; power and lack of control on power – will help prevent the different types of workplace violence that occur. These are just some of the factors that can cause workplace violence to occur. It is never acceptable to act out violently on someone. No one deserves to be the victim of violence in the workplace or anywhere else