Introduction

Values and Norms are the foundation on which you present yourself to the world.  Values and Norms can be based on a variety of things.  It can include things such as individual freedom all the way to topics such as love and marriage.  Values and Norms vary in a many different ways.  People base their values on where they are at the time.  Values and Norms can range from personal at home values to work values.  Furthermore, values differ across many cultures and countries.  Without values and norms there wouldn’t be a foundation to put yourself on to build who you are today.

The Idea in a Nutshell

Values and Norms are all about how and why people act.  They differ from place to place and person to person and all across cultures.  Without values and norms all people would act the same and do the same as the person besides them.  Values and Norms provide that variety to make each person and culture unique.  Values and Norms provide insight to many unique cultures.  They help people answer the main question—Why?

The 10 Things You Need to Know About Values and Norms

1.    Values and Norms date back to the first man and woman.  Values and Norms don’t have one specific place that they came from.  They developed as time passed on.  Many cultures have developed the unique values and norms that many people follow today.  Values and Norms are based on where you live and what you believe in.  In America, we base our values on freedom and the law.  Other societies base their values on a wide variety of things including Gods and other justice systems.  

2.    Norms are the social rules that govern people’s actions toward one another.  Furthermore, it’s the reason why people act the way they do towards their selves and others.  Norms tell us what is normal in a variety of situations.  It tells us what to wear, eat, think, and so on.  It provides the basis of what we consider normal in our everyday life.  

3.    Norms consists of two forms, which are Folkways and Mores.  Folkways consist of the routine conventions of everyday life.  Folkways have little moral significance.  They consist of things such as proper dress code, correct eating habits, and proper language.  A violation of these will not result in a serious punishment but still play a huge role in why we act they way we do.  Although folkways may not seem as important as other things they are still apart of who we are as an individual.   

4.    The other norm is Mores.  Mores are norms that are seen as central to how a society functions and how people socialize.  A violation of a more can bring great retribution.  Mores consists of things that involve theft, incest, cannibalism, and so on.  Mores will vary from culture to culture and in even some cultures mores have been enacted into law.   

5.    Values are abstract ideas about what a society believes to be good, right, and desirable.  People in a culture all value different things.  In America we value freedom.  In other cultures they may have a different value at the top of their list.  In all, values form the bedrock that each culture evolves around.

6.    Values differ from place to place also.  Values are very prominent in the household.  The head of the household lays down those values, usually consisting of quite of few.  The top family values are belonging, flexibility, respect, honesty, and forgiveness.  These values play an important role in having a harmonized household.  Many families will hold each other accountable to these values and help each other learn from these values.

7.    Also, values take place in the workplace.  These values define the workplace that you work in.  Many businesses set a list of values by which the workforce has to partake in and live by.  Most businesses have zero tolerance for breaking these values.  They believe that these values will bring great harmony between employees and create a positive work environment.  The top values in a workplace are strong work ethic, responsibility, positive attitude, and honesty.  

8.    Like said before, values and norms differ all across culture.  Different cultures will have different takes on what they value and what they consider normal.  This depends on a lot of different aspects such as their economy, government, and politics.  Even in some cultures their values and norms are decided for them.  In America, we decide on what we value and what we think of as normal.  Even though values and norms differ across cultures, it is something that we all can believe in.

9.    Knowing another cultures values and norms can give you a competitive advantage over other people.  It can give you the edge in doing business with foreign investors and companies.  Knowing what others believe in and what they consider normal is shown to be a great sign of respect.  In a lot of situations the person with cultural knowledge will be put ahead of everyone else and land the deal with the foreign investor.  It can also help you understand why another culture acts they way they do.  Having that competitive advantage helps you answer a lot of questions before partaking in foreign business.  It helps you prepare for any situation.

10.    Lastly, values and norms are what makes you, you.  Values and Norms give us that uniqueness that separates us from a lot of other people.  People place different values on things such as family, income, education, and personal appearance.  These vary from person to person depending on when and where you grew up and was raised.  Without the values and norms society would all act the same and there wouldn’t be any cultural diversity.  

The Video Lounge

This clip really does a great job showing what really goes on in the world today.  The world today values comedy and making fun of the social norm.   The video shows what society considers normal like opening the door for someone, and it also shows how society breaks those norms.  The video is definitely right on point on how society acts today and shows how violating a social norm is just as normal as following them.  

My Take

    The concept of values and norms still exist today, but society has made it very acceptable to stray from those values.  The world we live in today has made it very easy to get away from what we consider normal.  Managers today really have to make sure that employees will be loyal to them and their business.  Managers are having to ask employees real extensive question to make sure they are the right person for the job.   The word trust isn’t what it use to be.  Even though, there is a lot of corruption in the world now there are still people who hold their values to a high standard in their life and I really believe that.  In, all values and norms still take great precedent in many peoples life, but there is one thing we have to remember and that is that values differ from person to person and culture to culture.  So, before judging someone learn what their culture is and it will answer a lot of your questions.  

References

Kruger, S. (n.d.). Top 10 essential family values. Retrieved from http://www.zenfamilyhabits.net/2010/02/top-10-essential-family-values/

Loretto, P. (n.d.). The top 10 work values employers look for. Retrieved from http://internships.about.com/od/internshipsuccess/a/workvalues.htm

Sociology Guide. (2011). Social norms. Retrieved from http://www.sociologyguide.com/basic-concepts/Social-Norms.php

Uipurta. (2011, January 21). Meaning of values and norms in the community. Retrieved from http://family.wikinut.com/Meaning-of-Values-and-Norms-in-The-Community/p1a84h5w/

Marini, M. (n.d.). Social values and norms. Retrieved from http://edu.learnsoc.org/Chapters/4 key concepts in sociology/20 social values and norms.htm



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Contact Information

To contact the author of “The Top Ten Management Primer on Values and Norms,” please email Jordan Hymel at Jordan.Hymel@selu.edu.

About the Publisher  

David C. Wyld (dwyld.kwu@gmail.com) is the Robert Maurin Professor of Management at Southeastern Louisiana University in Hammond, Louisiana. He is a management consultant, researcher/writer, and executive educator. His blog, Wyld About Management, can be viewed at http://wyldaboutmanagement.blogspot.com/. He also serves as the Director of the Reverse Auction Research Center (http://reverseauctionresearch.com/), a hub of research and news in the expanding world of competitive bidding. Dr. Wyld also maintains compilations of his student’s publications regarding:

• management concepts (http://toptenmanagement.blogspot.com/)
• book reviews (http://wyld-about-books.blogspot.com/) and
• international foods  (http://wyld-about-food.blogspot.com/)                                         

The ability to reach large segments of the public is of great value in commerce, politics, and a society’s culture. The mass media are usually controlled by corporations (as in the United States) or by national governments (as in China). The mass-media industry employs professionals to conceive, produce, promote, and deliver communication products that are specifically designed to meet the goal of attracting large audiences. These products may be sold as objects (such as books—or downloaded e-books—or digital videodiscs [DVDs]) or exhibited for the price of a ticket or subscription (such as movies shown in cinemas or on premium or pay-for-view cable TV channels). Some services may be offered at no cash cost to consumers so as to create an audience for paid advertising (such as commercial television or radio broadcasts or Internet sites). Most newspapers and magazines are sold directly to the reader but depend on selling advertisements for their profitability. A growing number of newspapers and magazines are available online for no fee; this “freebie” has proved to be a challenge for the cash-strapped print media.

No communication technology is inherently a mass medium. Rather, it becomes such a medium through usage. Radio was invented at the end of the 19th century primarily for use as a two-way communication system to serve industrial shipping and naval operations. In the 1920s corporate decisions were made by several major electronics manufacturers to mass-produce inexpensive radio receivers for retail sale and to operate radio stations as incentives for consumers to buy those receivers. Thus radio broadcasting—a mass medium—was born; it quickly grew into the primary use of that medium. Television developed in the opposite way. It was first introduced to the general public as a mass medium in the late 1940s. Decades later the development of such supplementary appliances as the videocassette recorder and the home video camera allowed for its use as an interpersonal medium. The telephone has been an example of a medium of interpersonal communication that remained, primarily, just that. It was only occasionally used as a mass medium; telemarketers use computers to automatically dial thousands of phone numbers for the purpose of reaching a potential customer or playing recorded messages. Letter writing has historically been an interpersonal medium. Yet direct mailing of millions of letters of solicitation by post or by e-mail constitutes the use of the letter as a mass medium.

History

Mass media are essentially an industrial-era phenomenon. The first commercial printing industry during the early 18th century sprang up around London’s Grub Street. This is often cited as a beginning for mass media because of the recognizable economic system that was put into place. It was there that publishing found its early commercial applications; hand-operated printing presses were used to produce and reproduce thousands of copies of inexpensive literary products—including novels (”penny-dreadfuls”) and magazines. These were sold for profit to a growing audience of rudimentary readers. Publishing had previously depended on the clergy or the aristocracy for funding rather than on retail marketing.

A string of communication technologies were introduced during the 19th century and accelerated the development of the mass media. The invention of the steam-powered printing press (along with increasing literacy rates) gave rise to mass circulation of newspapers and magazines. These types of mass-produced print products—as well as books—were commonly available for sale in Europe and North America by the 1860s. Photography was invented in the 1820s. Methods for reproducing photographs in the print media were improved throughout the century and made such media ever more attractive to consumers. The development of still photography led to the invention of the motion picture. The cinema was an entirely new means of communication that showed great potential for mass-media application.

In the 1830s the telegraph was invented and was in practical use by the late 1840s. It was perhaps the single most important invention in the history of mass communication. It revolutionized existing media by supplying newspapers and magazines with a continuous stream of news dispatches from the region and even the nation. The Atlantic cable was completed in 1863; newspapers could then acquire information from around the world. Newspapers and magazines were bolstered by the resources of the telegraphic wire services and eventually achieved circulations numbering in the millions. Thus print became the first of the modern mass media.

Other types of media were gaining public attention on this scale by the turn of the 20th century. Silent movies became increasingly popular. Dramatic narratives provided the main audience draw, with the newsreel and the documentary film also garnering viewers. Attendance grew as the introduction of synchronous sound to feature films in 1927 married voice with picture.

The phonograph (invented in 1877) emerged as a mass medium as well. It achieved wider use as electrification of homes allowed for replacement of hand-cranked mechanical models. Sales of recordings reached mass proportions during the 1920s, with commercial radio used to popularize musical genres and to make stars of artists. The first U.S. commercial radio station went on the air in 1920. Radio networks linked stations in various parts of the country to carry a single program simultaneously by 1927.

By the mid-20th century, newspapers and magazines, movies, phonograph records, and radio programs were all conveniently available to most of the American population. These media provided many aspects of cultural learning to a sizable number of people. Eventually these mass media began to rival such traditional cultural determinants as family and religion. Some saw this as a natural and positive extension of democracy. Others criticized the mass media for failing to propagate existing culture and replacing it with a new mass culture based on consumerism at the expense of traditional or any other values.

Broadcast television emerged as the nexus of the mass media during the 1950s. It contained news, drama, cinema, music, and at least some content from all other mass media in a single, convenient home appliance. Television’s overwhelming functionality was soon dictating supplementary roles to other components of the mass media. Radio began to produce specialized programming for smaller target audiences. TV absorbed general-interest entertainment—from drama and comedy to variety—which had been among radio’s most popular attractions. Newspaper circulation had started to decline in the 1930s as radio journalism proved itself both faster and more popular. The number of daily U.S. newspapers began to drop precipitously with the spread of television. Most cities were left with only a single newspaper publisher. Many general-interest magazines disappeared as well; publishers sought the smaller and specialized audiences that television did not serve. Motion-picture attendance declined in the face of television’s at-home convenience.

Mass Media Today

Evolving technologies continue to drive the development of mass media. Instantaneous communication is a process that originated with the telegraph; it reached a milestone with the successful launchings of communications satellites into low Earth orbit. The first of these was Telstar 1 (1962). It orbited the Earth at a speed faster than the Earth revolves. This allowed for “windows” of time when video and audio transmissions could be made within a shifting orbital footprint. There are now dozens of high-capacity communications satellites in synchronous orbit; a reporter may attach a camera or microphone to a laptop computer and report live via satellite from virtually any location in the world.

The nationwide dissemination of cable TV was a process that took decades because of the necessity of seeking legal franchises in virtually every U.S. municipality. Cable subscription reached a saturation point in the late 1980s. The new mass medium began to remake TV in much the same way that the introduction of TV had remade radio and magazines. Cable channels sought smaller audiences with special target interests for advertisers specifically intent on reaching these audiences. But that changed in the first decade of the 21st century; both the number of cable channels and the size of audiences grew. Millions turned to cable news channels for presidential election coverage in 2008.

The 1990s, meanwhile, were marked by an explosive growth in online services for people who used computers and had access to the Internet. Critics hoped that the Internet might offer an alternative or even a counterforce to mass-media influence over public taste and public opinion (with e-mail, newsgroups, and chat rooms).

Mass-media ownership was characterized by concentration of ownership through mergers and acquisitions in the late 20th and the early 21st century. In the United States a consistent trend of deregulation since the 1980s left most of the television industry (as well as other mass media) in the hands of fewer than a dozen companies.

The 2001 merger of Time Warner—an integrated mass-media company with holdings in publishing, film and television, radio, recording, and just about every other form of mass communication—with America Online (AOL), the then-largest Internet service provider, epitomized this trend. This deal, however, was struck at the height of enthusiasm for Internet and media stocks. When new technologies were created, new online providers jumped in. AOL began to lose many of its users. This was followed by highs and lows in the stock market; a recession ensued in 2007. Time Warner and AOL “divorced” in 2009. As part of the split, Time Warner kept the entertainment site TMZ (Thirty Mile Zone) as well as CNN (Cable News Network), HBO (Home Box Office), TBS (Turner Broadcasting System), and TNT (Turner Network Television).

Large media companies—such as General Electric, Westinghouse, News Corporation, and the Bertelsmann Group—also lost their luster by the end of the first decade of the new millennium. Their success had been fueled largely by a surplus of stock portfolios and the oversized presence—and dreams—of modern moguls.

Mass Media and Democracy

When mass-media ownership was in the hands of a limited number of companies, fewer communicators (and fewer types of communicators) were available to supply users with content. Although this changed with the advent of the Internet, television—both network and cable—remained the major source of news for many individuals. Political or social biases (whether perceived or actual) in the media have compelled some viewers to identify themselves in political terms—liberal, conservative, radical, reactionary. Many of these viewers, in turn, read or watch media material that accords with their own ideology.

The challenge to active participation in democracy was further compounded when the mass media seemed to be in concert about which issues to cover. Some critics think that the inclusion of foreign-based news organizations broadens the variety of American news coverage. Evidence of this appeared during the 2003 Iraq War; radio and television coverage included that by the British Broadcasting Corporation. The fact that a number of important American newspapers (and television stations) are moving to outsource foreign coverage in order to save money may have a significant effect on domestic issues in the future.

The diminishing coverage of world events is the result of budget constraints; it may also be caused by physical inaccessability to newsworthy places because of censorship or lack of a free press. Foreign reporters were banned from Iran after the controversial presidential election of 2009. Yet thousands of videos taken by Iranian citizens during election protests were uploaded to the social media site YouTube and were broadcast on TV stations and Internet sites around the world. In this way, a degree of public access to world news is growing; making this growth possible are new technology and participation of individuals who make their images available to the mass media.

The Effects of Mass Media

Because of their central position as a source of cultural and social learning, the mass media are easily, and often, blamed for many of society’s ills. Some researchers believe that the mass media shape the way people view the world, especially when people have little direct experience. Others point to the media as providing role models—positive and negative—imitated by members of the audience. The portrayal of violence in the media is perhaps the most prominent issue. Other behavioral areas are of concern as well, such as explicit sex or extremely coarse language. These arguments tend to be based on a couple of suppositions: one is that the experience of content presented by contemporary mass media differs in some qualitative way from material that people have been exposed to since the beginning of social communication; the other is that individuals will copy or be influenced by what they view. Attempts to hold mass-media corporations legally responsible for the criminal acts of the consumers of their products have failed. A general consensus has been reached that people will have to continue to be responsible for their own behaviors in the age of mass media.

The value of a friendship, a situation or even just a moment is the value of impact and of the love shared for the growth in your evolution. As things may not last forever, one thing does… the impact essence of you on another. It may be in the silence of your soul or a memory that brings a smile to your face or as they say, “that one that got away.” The truth is that person, situation or moment changed you. In some connections bring out the best, making you a better person or perhaps the worst of you, like the ego and the mind take control; the mirror that needed to be expressed or surfaced and acknowledged. The depth of the connection may vary as does the meaning you place on that person, situation or moment. It is up to YOU to give it the meaning it has for you, if any meaning at all.  

The meaning of this all is to evolve and grow in compassion to self and embrace the mirror within you reflected in others. The “how” and “ways” does not matter. Distance, nor the age of the person or situation makes little difference in the impact of the meeting of the hearts and the mirror when it comes to the lesson. Like fingertips passing through the waters deep…on ships of gold and silver, the exchange has brought you to this point of awareness and changed you… the lasting meaning to your evolution is how you react to the interaction… with kindness or harshness… Harshness creates a trigger that reflects in relearning that learn until kindness and compassion fills you entirely. Kindness learned is compassion and love as I expressed in another blog, Open Letter to a Soul Mate in understanding the creation.

While I was talking with a friend, I came to understand the depth of how I created some situations and I am seeing the changes as I change my attitude about it. The kinder thoughts produce a better outcome. This friend stated something that made him rethought about a current situation. “You deserve cashmere and you are in K-mart”… how is that reflected with the people around you? 

Interesting reflection and perhaps a judgment of sorts isn’t it. You can get cashmere in K-mart. It is the reflection of efficiency and openness that places the value on that cashmere. The label or meaning you put on it is all that matters, not what society does. It is like saying… having friends from the “wrong” side of the track. Again, a judgment is being placed by association of the location, neither the heart connection nor spiritual growth potential.

Like minded individuals and situations are located every where you are attracted to…and the more you resist that attraction, the strong the attraction will persist. This is Universe law… so even if your intention is to walk away, avoid, ignore that situation or person, it will still be with you. There is still a value with you and in you about this.

This reminds me of the story of the king that traveled as a beggar to see who his true people were. He went to one house of wealth and was turned away… then another. Then he went to the poorest man, who had little to offer this beggar yet still shared his meal with him. The next day, the king returned gold to this man for his kindness.

So your thoughts produce the life you’re in and your actions tell where your heart is with the truth. Kindness will give you riches as the negative will continue to take it away as you wonder why.
We all deserve and are worthy of the riches and the form of  the riches does come in all ways. The people, situation and moments in your life are making the impact of the kinds of riches you have in your life, Gold or Coal.

A whispering of kindness and a smile may change a person live in many ways. Live through your heart and the world around will change for the better. Namaste.

(c)jenniferhillman 2012

        This simple example in italics which I am going to cite will tell you how important aesthetics is in our lives. I came home after a tiring day at work feeling really exhausted and low. When I entered my home, I saw the dining table beautifully decorated with my favourite food and all the items neatly arranged on the table. There was a vase of lovely roses displayed in the centre and a card with the words ‘ Thank you mummy for being a wonderful person.’ 

       It wasn’t mother’s day or my birthday. With the lovely thoughts and the attractive table layout, my tiredness and exhaustion just vanished. Aesthetics can drive away unpleasantness and the feeling of depression in the wink of an eye.

        When one looks at the skyline in the different countries of the world one sees the various landmarks. What makes these landmarks unique? It’s their beauty of form and architecture which projects an aesthetic value. Likewise when we are at the movies, aesthetics has a great role to play in our appreciation or rejection of the movie that is being watched on screen. 

        Aesthetics can determine relationships as well. How one moves, talks and carries oneself and one’s  body  language and words used in speech can portray one’s personality which indirectly creates the ’halo effect.’ This is the reason some of us are classified as charismatic or otherwise. It doesn’t take one to know rocket science to be categorised as charismatic. Quoting Albert Einstein, ‘Imagination is more important than knowledge,’ I end by saying that even the most learned and astute of scholars may not be charismatic if they lack aesthetics.

Polyamory is nothing to do with parrots.

Polyamory –

Based on the Latin and Greek words

For ‘many’ and ‘loves’.

Polyamory-

Having more than just yourself and

Your partner in your relationship.

Polyamory,

Everyone involved in the relationship-

Knows about it and

Is happy with.

Don’t confuse it with Polygamy,

If you’re brought up in a culture

Where this is the norm,

There isn’t much you can do to change.

But if not,

It must seem like a very odd!

Polyamory differ from swinging-

Polyamorists claim to enjoy a range of partners-

But rather than just having sex with them

Like swingers do,

They share ‘deep emotional bonds’.

It is hard to prove if you are shagging someone

Because you enjoy it or

Whether you have a ‘deep emotional bond’ with.

Bonds like that don’t develop overnight.

If you tell your wife

You have been shagging that blonde

Who works in the supermarket but

It is all right because ‘you are a Polyamorists and

You have a deep emotional bond with her’,

You still ought to expect a frying pan

To come hurtling towards your head in a matter of seconds.

Polyamory as a lifestyle

Picture this – you live with your wife and

Two kids and you decide you want to take another sexual partner.

You explain the concept of Polyamory to your wife

Just so she can’t accuse you of cheating behind her back.

After dodging the frying pan,

You suggest moving the other woman

Into the house and

Thereby forming a loving threesome.

Everything will be out in the open and

You will love your wife and

The other woman equally.

How does that sound?

Hey, maybe the other woman

Can do half the housework.

Frying pans speak louder than words and

Your wife also wonders what your children will make of it,

Especially when their friends find out and

Tease them.

Children can be extremely cruel.

If your wife has any interest in involving another sexual partner or

Partners in your relationship,

She might suggest a swingers’ club.

That way, the children have a nice evening in

With a babysitter or

Their Gran and you get to have adult fun

Somewhere away from the family home.

Alternatively, your wife might hate the whole idea,

Hurl something else at you,

Call you a lousy cheat and

Pack her bags.

A very risky arrangement-

There do exist polyamorous relationships which

Seem to work,

With nobody in the relationship

Feeling jealous and everyone being happy.

For most people though,

Inviting more people into a relationship

Is asking for trouble.

An evening swinging is a temporary way

To have fun and meet other,

Likeminded people.

Making it a permanent arrangement and

Bringing love into the equation is asking for disaster.

Polyamorists tend to think

They are better than

Swingers but swingers are just being

Honest about what they want.

Swingers want sexual interaction and

They make that perfectly clear by visiting swinging clubs,

Placing ads for swingers to visit them at home or

Even using cam to cam online swinging.

People like to have sex with their partner-

In the same room as another couple having sex and

Swinging even if there is little or

No physical contact apart from between

Your own partner and yourself.

Just an excuse-

Polyamorists are ‘making an excuse’

For their Behaviour.

Not just having sex as

They are horny and

Want sex but there is love involved,

Which they say makes it a superior lifestyle.

Swingers believe there is nothing wrong

With swinging if that is what

Both people in the relationship wants to do but

Adding emotions to the equation

Is a very risky thing to do.

You are not swinging any more,

Having fun and playing then going home

with partner.

Forming complicated love triangles and

will always be worried that

Your partner will prefer one of his or

Her other partners and

Ultimately leave you for them.

Most Polyamorists use the term

As they don’t want to admit

They like to swing or

Because they are cheating

On their partner and

Don’t want her to find out about it and

Leave him.

Polyamory –

Both parties in the relationship approve of having sex

With people outside the relationship.

Polyamorists wants

His cake and wants to eat it too.

If you want sexual experiences with other people,

Why not just be open about it?

Polyamory doesn’t make sense

If Polyamory is about deep emotional bonds rather

Than just having sex for fun,

This doesn’t make sense.

Because to form a deep emotional bond,

You have to know the person very well.

If you get to know someone that well and

Then have sex with them,

This is cheating!

If you have sex with them before developing a bond,

This is technically swinging

And cheating if your wife doesn’t approve or know about it.

I would just say this –

Don’t label yourself a Polyamorists.

Be honest and admit that you like to swing.

There are millions of other people who like it too

So it’s nothing to be ashamed of.

And you certainly don’t have to think up other names

To disguise it like ‘Polyamory’ –

just swing away and enjoy the experiences!

Both of us reached Tanjore (by force of habit I am more comfortable with this name rather than Thanjavur) by train where at the retiring room, we had a wash and breakfast.  The taxi man was not quite conversant with this village.  I told him we had to go on the Tanjore – Trivadi (Thiruvaiyaru?) road and branch off at Kandiyur, to take the road to Thirukattuppalli, where this village is situated enroute.   The last traces of reservation in the taxi driver were wiped off when I expressed my confidence in locating it.

As we rode along, I recalled volubly, in a monologue mostly, how we spent weekends at the farmhouse whenever we came to Tanjore with my grandfather who was a very well-to-do lawyer there.  How in gay abandon, we bathed in the river, of course under the strict supervision of Arockiam, who was a sort of Jeeves – Man Friday to my grandfather.  After the bath, there were bunches of luscious mangos waiting to be brought down by us, either by stone-throwing or climbing of the trees.  No questions asked.  Either the ‘tope’ belonged to my grandfather, or the other owners had so much regard for him, they did not mind this. The moment unripe ones were collected, Chechan (that’s how we called Seshan the cook) was thoughtfully ready with a knife and a plateful of salt and chilli powder, which went so well with it.  Then it was tender coconut water guzzling time.  Arockiam would easily climb even the tallest trees.  God knows how many gallons of it we will have taken for which according to Arockiam, the antidote was the ‘dosaipadam’ coconut, which also slid down our throats in terms of pounds.  Then our attack was on ‘nungu’ – the delicacy which the palmyra trees yielded.  As we meandered through the maze of mangers full of milch and drought animals, we are protectively warned by Arockiam to be wary of a particular bull, which was allergic to anyone wearing full pants!  It will strain at the tether to charge and chase.  Fortunately, I had not reached that stage sartorially.  These all ended with a session of ‘kittipul’, the precursor of modern day cricket, at the river bed.

All these I was recounting with the joy of a school boy on his first visit to circus, when the taxi passed the arch indicating the entry to the famous composer, Narayana Theertha’s Samadhi at Thiruppanthurithi.  He was a contemporary of Saint Tyagaraja and has composed songs in Sanskrit, collectively called ‘Krishna Tarangini’, in praise of Lord Krishna.  To introduce some element of tight-heartedness, I told my grandson that people of this place has also a dubious distinction of being known for their brand of hospitality with nothing really coming forth from the host.  It seems the inhabitants there have a habit of accosting any visitor with a supposition they will not ‘deign to have lunch or dinner with them’ to scotch the slightest hope in the visitor of prospects in that direction.  As we passed Thiruppanthurithi, I was looking out for Senthalai as a sequel but I had difficulty in locating any old and familiar landmark.  Admittedly, I felt like Alice in Wonderland.  I was keen however, we should not overshoot Karuppur, portals for Konerajapuram, which should not take more than 10 minutes drive (Yes, those days also we used to go by car and my grandfather was keen to have a new Dodge every year).

I could see my grandson being sympathetic at my discomfiture.  More by timing I felt we reached Konerajapuram, which I wanted to confirm by slowing down the vehicle, pushing my head through the window, and ask a passer-by on bicycle, who was busy simultaneously with listening to a small transistor, if we were in Konerajapuram.  He simply nodded his head without stopping either the cycling or the transistor.  Undaunted, I sought a supplementary ‘where is vakil pannai?’  It was gracious of him to have taken some time off both the activities and also spit out the betel juice, the tertiary activity, which surfaced only then to ask us to go straight and take the first left.

As we were proceeding I was telling my grandson how those days we had to make do with what was called ‘crystal sets’, which was something like a headphone, in these villages.  At best, it can pick up programmes from AIR, Trichy; the nearest radio station, that too in fits and starts and in a feeble way.  Radios did not work here.  My grandson was fairly impressed, I thought.  I then told him how the farmhouse, fairly big with country tiles and long verandah, was a well known landmark in these areas.  We had a neighbour by name, Chandrahasu – a tall, strapping practical farmer with a golden ‘kappu’, on his right wrist.  The moment he heard the Dodge approaching, he will come running to greet my grandfather who will enquire about his health, by calling him solicitously ‘Chandrakasu’ in the local lingo.  Despite my grandfather offering him a seat, he would remain standing – a very picture of courtesy dipped in docility, which I always thought was rather incongruous in a hefty, well-to-do mirasdar like him.  In the midst of keeping my grandfather informed about the latest in the area, he would have time to ask me with a genuine affection how I fared, health and study-wise.  He always brought for me home-made manoharam, a local sweet delicacy, made of jaggery syrup and thenkuzhal.

Yes, I thought we had reached the place of the farmhouse.  Reclining on an easy chair was someone obese.  As I got down and approached him, he did not even make the slightest motion to get up, much less asking us to come in.  He was at least good enough to say ‘yes’ in a terse way though, when I asked if that was the vakil’s farmhouse.  He did resemble Chandrahasu.  May be, his great-grandson.

Before my grandson got down, I got in and asked the driver to get back to Tanjore.  What a disturbing contrast I said to myself.  Almost throughout the entire return trip, I was silent.  Even the driver asked me if I was unwell.  Not that emotion thwarted expression.  It was a sense of despondency, more than disappointment that made me look out of the car window at a distant nothing.  Sentiment did moisten my eyes.  By way of breaking the ice, my grandson said, ‘thatha, recently I chanced to see an old English movie “Vanishing Prairie” on the fast disappearing prairies due to cultivation and homestead coming up’.  I knew he was trying to buttress my sagging morale.  All I could answer was, ‘even if prairies vanish, values shouldn’t.

I was looking to the next immediate flight to where I work and live soon on reaching Chennai.    

Where have I been ? I have been fighting god. Does any one know how to get god of their back?

Okay now to an even more pressing question? What is wrong with you conservatives? Besides my on going battle with the “creator”, I have also given up on conservatives. Your flirtation with Donald Trump, Rick Perry, Herman Cain, and now Nwet Gingrich has convinced me conservatives are not smart enough t o pic a good candidate.

It is of up most importance to me for people to understand that current economic and political problems in America are the result of people with poor ethics and poor morality. Lack of talent in finance and economics is not the issue.

Today, on the Laura Ingraham radio show I heard a sound clip of Mr. Gingrich supporting a healthcare mandate. I know in 2010 Gingrich supported a candidate for US senate that was not a true conservative, but had the support of the Republican establishment. A lot of people have seen the commercial with Mr. Gingrich and a liberal. In addition, Mr. Gingrich harshly and in a negative manner criticized Paul Ryan’s economic plan.

Okay, boys and girls can you say political operative? I would say Mr. Mitt Romney is also a political operative. However, the liberal news reports that Romney is the republican front runner.

Alright my allegiance are with Mrs Michelle Bachmann. Again, I say she has the education, experience, values, and high moral character needed to be a great president.

However, many people need the Republican Power center to manipulate them through the use of Fox news and other conservative media in order to have a perceived original thought.

I am left wondering why all these conservatives with their political “man crushes” cannot see what I see. Us politicians need to recognize that they serve the people. The people do not serve them.

However, 62 million Americans made the horrible mistake of voting for the so-unprepared= Barack Hussein Obama. Some in this group were conservatives. Some one explain this fact to me.

Okay do not explain it to me. Explain how a question that was answered in 2008 is again an open question. I am speaking of Mitt Romney.

Christian conservatives should never support a Mormon. Mormons believe that Christ is the brother of Satan. This should be more than enough for Christians not to support a Mormon.

However, how about Mr. Romney changing his values? How do you trust a person who can enter a room full of moderates and tell them everything they want to hear, then enter a room of ultra-conservatives and tell those people everything they want to hear? Mr. Romney has to be lying to some one.

The again the candidates are no the problem. If a person has been paying attention, he or she would know how is a real values centered person with high moral character.

Sarah Palin did disappoint me. In a time when America needs a person with high integrity and great talent , the only other person then Michelle Bachmann who in my mind meet these criteria refuses to fight. My heart is crushed. I am demorralized.

I know about the sick political machine that t involves FOX news, the Republican power center, and financial backers who did not want to see Palin as president of the United States. I am well aware of the fact that Sarah Palin knows about this perverse machine also.

I did want a fight,though. These are critical times. The US will not survive much longer with politicians who care more about their “click” then they care about every day Americans.

I cannot fight with people who are not using their smarts. The one resume of a candidate with education, experience, values, and integrity is Mrs. Michelle Bachmann’s resume.

Why my current attitude? Is it because I have had to construct my own resume that I can recognize a great resume when I see one? Is it because I value honor and integrity above anything else? Could it be because people who I thought were warriors for America really are nothing more than petty voters?

I do not want Bachmann to win just because she is “my candidate”. America needs leadership that can be trusted. There are already to many convenient politicians in all levels of government service in America.

The people have to rip their government out of the hands of these unscrupulous politicians. However, when conservatives do not even know that a perfectly good conservative with high moral standards, is starring them in the face, can there really be any hope for the US.

I believe this is the end for America. Her destroyers are not the immoral and unethical politicians. America’s people do not have the mental talent to choose a good president and a better congress.

It is sad that so many Americans choose pettiness over substance. It is petty to choose a candidate based on emotion. The question of America’s next president is a cerebral question.

I just do not think many conservatives know how to use their brains. Sarah Palin is a great person with the education, experience, values, and high moral character needed for the office of the president of the United States. However, people allowed the media, including Fox news, to make them hate Mrs. Palin.

Therefore, I cannot blame Mrs. Sarah Palin for choosing to run away instead of fighting. I still love her. I will always have great respect for her. She is still on my list of “people I would die to protect”.

However, here we are. America needs a great leader. Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachmann are these leaders. However, conservatives are spending their time flirting with obvious liberals such as Donald Trump, Rick Perry, Nwet Gingrich, Herman Cain, and Mitt Romney.

I can no longer watch the madness. In addition, I would like to wish conservatives well in 2012. However, I am greatly afraid about what you are about to do in the next United States presidential elections. 

I am no ‘culture vulture’ if I may say so.  For me culture is nothing but a way of life that has crystallized over millennium of years (why even in day today or wok a day life we hear of ‘cultured family ‘work-culture’ etc.) into a heritage.   It is not as though ‘heritage’ is an insular or impervious entity.  It has to be adaptive to ‘welcome’ changes – say those which will upgrade the life or enable it to keep pace with the changing times.  But the core or the quintessence of culture admittedly is some thing sacrosanct and not to be smothered. 

Now comes the relevance of education.  While it cannot be equated with culture, it is not antithetical either, as many in a half-baked or hurried way will like to dismiss it.  Education is nothing but compressed experience conveyed for easy and early assimilation.  If certain ‘experiences’ in this sense can be dove tailed to our way of life for ‘that’ improvement in quality of life, concept of “non-changing culture” should not be a hurdle or hindrance to such edifying ‘experience’ being used.

Take for instance music.  The educative part of it especially – in classical or carnatic – which entailed earlier gurukul vasa concept in which the student or disciple learnt the three R’s connected with music by being with the master years together and spending days on for riaz/sathaha.  But today, the dynamic world we live in, we have sishyas turned out in fast track as it were who give ‘capsuled concerts’ which also suits the ‘rasikas‘ in a hurry.  If gurukul or gharana system is bluntly insisted under the garb of “preserving” culture, neither will there be musicians nor rasikas to talk about.  In a manner of speaking, we should be happy that in the current capsuled or compressed concerts essential trappings of the music is retained. 

Same holds good in games – cricket for example where arguably the ‘one dayers’ has definitely saved cricket being dead as a dodo, which will have happened if purists had a say and 5 dayers had been thrust down the unwilling throats of the aficionados on the plea of preserving culture connected with cricket. 

In both the cases, music and cricket as long as they are not reduced to pantomime / tom

foolery for ‘popularizing’ these we should feel happy that there is no injury to connected culture.  It is relevant however to echo the feelings of Lata Mangeshkar who was critical of the so called ‘ re mixes’ of old semi classicals which are displayed visually in a vulgar way by obnoxious gyrations to tunes totally different from the ones  that haunted the mind pleasingly for so long.  It is such stuffs that “cultural shocks” are made of.

Two more instances where ‘changes’ have happened for over all benefit without ‘mauling’ or ‘smothering’ culture.  Banks of yester years harped on ‘savings’.  Today the slogan can perhaps be ‘spend’.  There are so many schemes which have helped people become more mobile and live securely and comfortably under new and better roofs.   These all helps people more comfortably placed and keep pace with fast and modern times.

Another is the farm front.  Years back when tractors came about for the first time there were protests galore from traditional farmers.  They went to the extent of saying “machine will hurt mother earth”, “the produce will not taste good” and the like.   Can we have managed ‘Green revolution’ and self sufficiency in agri products with bulls and ploughs?  Tractors have come to stay and so are other mechanical gadgets, and yet agriculture, a strategic facet of our culture is not injured.

Like education, two other ‘presumed’ equations for culture are – language and religion.  Many times this is exploited to spawn the unwelcome parochialism and fanaticism.  Just because we learn another language it does not mean the mother tongue is given the go by.  You can be a linguist and yet contribute to the growth of your language by translating good literary work in other languages in your mother tongue for the benefit of those who know only their mother tongue.  Like wise the good work in your mother tongue can be translated into other languages for the benefit of others.  In both the mother tongue automatically gets ‘promoted’ and not ‘perished’.

Religion, easily the worse of the two agent provocateurs, has of late is producing ‘terrorists’ instead of saints it used to earlier.  Why like in tourism, replete with classifications, we have now a classification called ‘religious terrorists’.  Religion to me is all about guidelines enshrined for a moral and good life.  But somewhere down the line this has been truncated and twisted to strike at the very root of “life” – not to talk of good one at that.

Education should enable us to rogue out non-essentials and misinterpreted facts from religion lest it becomes a bundle of superstitions and take us down the path of intolerance and convert us gradually from an innocuous religious lot to hard core fundamentalists via fanaticism. 

Education, religion and modern concepts in any field of activity, that contribute for comfort and convenience without compromising our value system should all go to make ‘culture’ a dynamic concept and help us in retaining, in an essential way, our way of life – yes good one most certainly.

In this scheme of things respect for the elders and the educated, consideration for the aged, disabled and the down trodden must be reinstated.  There must be tolerance for others points of view and an altitude of learning and imbibing to improve at whatever stage and wherever it is from.  An entity directing us towards all above is nothing but ‘culture’.

During freshmen orientation at Penn State in 1964, before Joe Paterno became head coach, we were taught that the sky was blue and white because God was a Penn State fan and Happy Valley is His abode. That fall, unranked Penn State beat Ohio State, ranked number one in the polls. Within minutes, there was a lockdown of all the dorms but because this could not happen fast enough, thousands of students exited the dorms and went downtown and had a riot in celebration of this unexpected away game victory. Cars were overturned but there were no arrests and no student disciplinary action. All student inflicted damages were paid by Penn State. Football related riots at Penn State are not uncommon. The last one occurred the night Paterno was fired.

Over the years that followed everything good that happened at Penn State was attributed to Joe. The creamery served “peachy Paterno ice cream” and Sandusky blitz and we knew we were in Joe’s place. The Penn State alumni organization became the largest membership organization of its kind. The Penn State Phon became the largest student run charitable fund raising organization. Since 1977 the Phon has raised over $ 78 million for Children Hospital at the Hershey Medical Center. For more than 20 years, Joe and Sue have been actively involved in the Special Olympics summer program at Penn State. Paterno has contributed more than $ 4 million to Penn State academic programs and $ 1 million to Mount Nittany Medical Center in State College. Almost all of this money has been contributed since 1998. Bob Milley said if it is done for the wrong reasons it will never be blessed.

For many years I have been uncomfortable about the Penn State culture that had alternating slogans depending on how well the football team was doing: “The drinking school with a football problem” is one that I have not heard in a while. Lately the slogan has been “the football school with a drinking problem.”

When my son decided to go to Penn State I became a diehard football fan who believed that Paterno had earned the right to decide when he should retire. My son graduated from Penn State in 2007, 40 years after I graduated from Penn State. I was proud to be a Penn State fan. I had become a member of the cult.

Sometime over the years something changed. My son was involved in a minor fender bender automobile accident with Joe. My son’s friends told him no accident report, no insurance claim for damage to his car and that the accident was obviously his fault even though even then my son and his friends knew that Joe should not be driving.

By 2006, so many students wanted to attend the Penn State football games but there were not enough student seats so they had to hold a lottery for student tickets. My son lost the lottery. He was upset and told his then girlfriend who called her grandfather who talked to his friend and neighbor Joe who provided two tickets on the 50 yard line. My son was not the only one who believed Joe could do no wrong. Joe was so idolized he had become God. We did not know then but we can speculate that this fender bender happened about the time Joe was informed of the pending secret grand jury and that he would be called as a grand jury witness to testify about the Sandusky sex scandal.

In 1998 Sandusky was investigated by Children Protective Services but the District Attorney declined to prosecute. In 2002 a Penn State graduate assistant informed Paterno that he witnessed a Sandusky event. Paterno informed the Athletic Director and Vice President for Business affairs. The vice president was also in charge of Campus Police Department which since 1997 has the full status and all the police powers possessed by every municipal police department in Pennsylvania. The report which was made known to the President of the University resulted in no action. The Athletic Director and Vice President were both indicted for failure to report and perjury. Paterno was instrumental in selecting this Athletic Director. Other incidents involving Sandusky occurring off campus were reported to the local police but no charges resulted. One Sandusky incident involving two boys was reported to the state police but no charges were filed.

Everybody thought that Sandusky was forced out as defensive coordinator to provide a clear path for Jay Paterno to succeed his father as head coach. Sandusky was forced out to prevent him from becoming the next head coach. Paterno realized that man whose autobiography was titled “Touch” had become untouchable. He did not realize that he himself had become a cult figure.

In Acts of the Apostles, King Herod Agrippa held a royal audience where people following his speech shouted “this is the voice of God, not man. Immediately an angel of the Lord smote him, because he did not give God the glory; and he was eaten by worms and died.”

During Watergate, many young attorneys working for Nixon ended up in jail for their activities covering up the Watergate burglary and lying to congressional committees and grand juries about their knowledge and involvement. The Nixon cult followers went too far and in many instances there is no indication that they were following orders. They were merely too zealous to the cult. They did what they thought Nixon would want them to do.

I suggest that probably the same type of mentality has inflected the cult people at Penn State. They did what they thought Paterno would want them to do to protect the reputation of Penn State. But Jesus told us to protect the little ones.

Following Watergate, the law changed and you may not believe it but attorneys are now required to take classes in legal ethics every year. The attorney who represented Penn State as its house counsel was also the attorney representing 2nd Mile, the charitable institution for children founded by Sandusky. All of the victims were receiving services from the 2nd Mile.

Some disturbing aspects of the problem have not yet become public. There is a significant homosexual community at Penn State so strong that it was able to forced the retirement of a good ladies basketball coach who had been coach for 20 years. She was vocally anti-gay. She had not changed with the times and her conduct probably violated the anti discrimination laws. This event three years ago revealed the presence of a strong gay and lesbian community that are big financial contributors not only to Penn State but also to 2nd Mile.

I do not have any answers. I do not even know what are the questions. They say speech writing is cathartic and that people prone to depression should become writers. I say detectives should engage in this cathartic exercise to ask the disturbing questions that no one want to hear.

They need to change the liturgy at Penn State, God is not a Penn State fan and Happy Valley is not his abode because this mindset easily results in a mentality that the cult can do no wrong. There is a cult at Penn State with many disturbing aspects. Removing the peachy Paterno and the Sandusky blitz does not begin to scratch the surface; such changes are superficial and should not even be made. They should remain to remind us what was the cult at Penn State.

What Penn State did was evil because they attempted to use the legal system to evade personal responsibility and as a result of their collective actions many innocent boys were terribly hurt.

They say ethics can not be taught. Ethics consists of knowing what we ought to do, and such knowledge can be taught. Attorneys have to take mandatory continuing education classes with ethic components. Obviously school administrators should also be taking continuing education courses with ethic components.  We may not be able to change Wall Street or Paternoville but we can teach our kids and our members what we ought to do.

There have been so many editorials, opinions, comments that I am starting to wonder if I could actually say anything new or profound about the scandal. That having been said, I think we need to recognize what the scandal says about ourselves as individuals in a society that has been high-jacked by what I would say is a rather liberal view of what is permissible sexuality and a demand for political correctness that overrides being theologically correct. Political correctness requires that we be diplomatic, that is to say, recognizing when we should say nothing. Many church people being very diplomatic, vote with their feet. I have been sitting in the pew wondering if I am still a Lutheran. We have been silence when we should have been shouting, something which admittedly is not Lutheran.

The irony is the Lutheran doctrine of Sola Scriptura has inevitably led to this liberalism sanctioned by a new interpretation of scripture which I deplore. Theology has changed to meet new circumstances, something that St. Luke recognized, even it those who made the change do not recognize it.

This liberalism has made it possible for someone to credibly say “I was horsing around with the boys.” I am hoping and praying that we recognize that this new liberalism and the defense which it has spawned is horse manure.

Copyrighted © 2011

The point of this is not about what he will endure as a student. It’s not about answers; rather, it’s about the questions I find myself asking. It’s a new ideology that’s developing. Every question directed towards his education reveals something new to me as a mother and mainly as a mother. I’ve had many opportunities to reveal things to the other parts of myself.  I noticed the opinions I once trusted have changed, or at least what I consider when presented with opinions. Pathways now look different from the usual starting point. I think most importantly the values of others play a major part in the way I make my decisions. The moment I began question number one, was the moment I opened a certain part of my life as a parent. The day I began asking which school, was the day I began asking what’s important. The first image I had of him leaving his life as my baby and starting his life in school was the moment things changed. Some might think I’m turning a small natural thing into this intense matter; that this heartfelt moment won’t mean as much when he’s older and when school and life get more complicated. At least this is what crosses my mind… Then I remember how it started. I began the first steps of enrolling him in school…. Things just got more complicated.