The Struggle To Find One’s Identity

People are fake. They are “phonies” as Holden would call it. Driven by their narcissistic needs, people strive for self-improvement and self-gain. There is no one in this world who can say they do not. In The Catcher In The Rye, the main character, Holden, struggles to find his place in society. He is a bird that fails to grow into his wings. And in many ways, I have felt the same way. I have been searching for my identity – of who I really am, and it is only this past year that I have discovered many truths about myself – truths that I have hid from not only the people around me, but also from myself.

            Having friends is a simple way to find security. I know that I could not have lived through all the stress and anxiety in my life without friends. They provide relief and a person to vent to. But much of the time, I feel that I made the majority of my friends so that I feel belonged. I wanted to feel as if I were important – an accomplishment everyone seems to look for. This is why it is so difficult to find genuine people that truly care about others and their interests. Everyone is too involved in finding that genuine person that they forget that others are searching too. Finding one’s identity is collaboration, a group contribution between many people. We find who we are when we search for it, and in doing so, we also help others find who they are.

            The transition from middle to high school was tough for me. Knowing only about twenty people coming into high school, I was afraid that I wouldn’t fit in, and I bet others worried as well. To assuage myself, I found a decent group which I could identify myself with. Three years pass and I began to notice small nuisances. I began to realize that my group of friends hardly listened to what others had to say, even though what was said was more logical and sometimes more valid than their own reasoning. I also found that most of their conversations and laughters were from the defaming of another “friend”. I understand that in order for a friendship to form, there must be some sort of bond, but the repetitiveness of the ridicule and teasing became unbearable. In the end, though I have never taken part in the ridiculing and teasing, I found myself ashamed to be a part of that group Yet, I am, in one way or another, a part of that group to this day. I still talk to them as if they were my friends. Why? The sole reason lies in the fact that I never wish to be alone. I would rather have acquaintances than to be all alone in this world. This is similar to Holden’s hypocritical views on others. For example, Holden cannot stand Ackley. He finds Ackley to be very annoying and inquisitive, but he keeps him as a friend. Holden also exudes the same behaviors as Ackley to his roommate, Stradlater, and does not recognize it. He is so self-absorbed into what he wants from others that he forgets the words he has spoken about such “phonies”. He has failed to discover that he is no better than his peers. Friends have become a vital part in my life as well as Holden’s. They have provided the comfort and security that the void cannot, and to Holden and I, we value the comfort and security.

            Holden also finds security through his constant revisits to many familiar places, such as the bar and the history museum. Just as I go to my friends for help and security and a place to learn more about myself, Holden finds this place in his memories. His frequent visitations to the museum, particularly the history museum shows Holden’s unwillingness to change and grow up. It is in these memories that he feels most secure about his future. He discovers that he does not want to grow up, and more than once, he has set the museum as the meeting place for his younger sister, Phoebe. In this context, we can see Holden’s goal in life – to prevent others close to him from growing up. Hence, a catcher in the rye. His newfound occupation is further reinforced when he brings Phoebe to the amusement park and urges her to go to the parasol. He not only wants people to retain their youth, but also live it while they still can.

            More recently, I have found myself with another group of people. I have tried to reinvent myself into a more outgoing and social person. And to some extent, I have succeeded. I have found my identity through that group and that has allowed myself to be more open with others. I no longer have anything to hide my true self away from anyone. Similarly, Holden does not restrain his thoughts about others with the audience. He presents his story the way he sees it, uncensored and untamed. This unique characteristic about Holden brings out part of his identity. As the novel progresses, the audience unravels Holden piece by piece. We know that Holden understands that he has lost his youth and that he can never obtain it again. This realization allows Holden to find himself. Just like I have been struggling to find my niche in high school, Holden struggles to find his future. He only finds himself when he is presented with the opportunity to “save” Phoebe. His ambition comes from one source: his younger brother’s death. Throughout the book, he reminisces about his little brother. He tries so desperately to hang onto his little brother that it has stalled his own growth and has delayed his discovery of himself. It is only when he forgets about his past and starts focusing on his future that he is able to recognize who is wants to be. Although I have never lost a family member like Holden, I have lost someone very close and dear to me in a different manner: my grandma. She had lived in the United States in my early elementary years. I created a bond so strong with her that I thought it was indestructible. I felt that nothing could get in between my grandma and I when we were together. But I wrong. She eventually had to leave and return to her homeland, and the hundreds of miles separated us. Distance disintegrated the bonds. I have looked back on this event many times and could never forgive myself letting her leave. But now, after visiting her in 2008, I realize that the past has only prolonged my struggle to find myself. And so I let her go. Today, I have a better understanding of who I am. The obstacle that was my past has vanished, but there is still one more obstacle I cannot overcome: high school.

            They say high school is a place to find oneself. But they never said how hard it would be. For me, finding my identity meant finding my sexuality. I have spent countless hours in middle school and the beginning of high school trying to figure out who I am. At first, it was tough. I was drowned in confusion. I knew that society looked down upon gays. And I knew I would be made fun of for proclaiming myself to the world. But was I really gay? I wasn’t sure. How could I find out my identity when even mentioning the thought of it scares people away and makes them think I am different? The sad truth: I couldn’t have, not in high school, and especially not in junior high. There are too many ignorant, closed-minded people in this world that are unable to accept the fact that people are different. Even Holden freaks out on Mr. Antolini’s “flitty pass” and uses a derogatory term to describe gays. Societal views blockaded my discovery. It was only through the encouragement and security of my new group of friends that helped me discover my true self and the love of my life.

I am no different than any other person. Let that be known. And there is a reason for every action. Identity defines who we are, but it should not be mistaken for personality. I have found my identity through the help of my friends and through the dismissal of part of my past. The immense pressures from society have lengthened the time it took to find my identity, but I am thankful I have been able to find it. I no longer have to pretend, as everyone already knows, and I am forever grateful that I have associated myself with such amazing people – people who don’t care whether their friends are gay or straight, people who provide the sanctuary for the ones that need it, and people who support one another to find their place in society. Once lost, but now found. That is my story.

The study asked a group of people a say in ten acts, such as using public transport without paying the required money, and keep the money found in the street, throw trash on the ground and lying.

The study showed that 50% of Britons now consider the betrayal of a partner is not justified, compared to 70% ten years ago.

And rejects 20% of Britons today to keep the money found in the street, compared to 40% in 2000.

The study – conducted on the Internet and included more than two thousand Rashid – that young people under 25 years of age tend to accept unfair actions most of those elders.

While the third of young people not older than 25 years that trickery in the CV is not acceptable, rejected three-quarters of the people beyond the age of 65 years this matter, and rejected five young people lying outright, compared with 55% of people over the age of 65 years.

Can instruct this is that people generally cling to principles more with age.

But Professor Paul Whiteley, who led the study says the decline of integrity among young people is also a worry, “The Integrity gain in adolescence, like political positions.”

The study showed that women are more honest than men, a little, but the social class and function are not altering anything in the results.

According to Whitley, the degree of integrity refers to the level of civil sense. In case of decline, “people lose confidence in each other and stop all work together in groups and will worsen, and become the educational and economic performance is weaker, and it leaves serious repercussions.”
 
 
Source: French

Often bullies set up a website or group on a social media website like Facebook and then ask other people to join in and comment about a person or images of them.

But it can also include things like emailing someone a virus on purpose, posting personal information where it shouldn’t be or calling them names when playing a game together online.

Cyberbullies can’t cause physical pain, but because of the way we now live ourlives-with mobile phones and lots of internet use-they can be very hard to avoid.

Another big difference between normal bullying and cyberbullying is that it’s often difficult to workout who the bullies are, as they can hide behind fake names.

2. Sex to Feel Capable
Most of the young men thought themselves capable of if had had sex. Especially when it has been done over and over again. Opinions of this kind arise because the level of thinking that young people are still green and also insights about the world they are still a little sex. Not to mention the social atmosphere coupled with teens who idolize those who are skilled or frequent jamming sex in daily life

3. Sex Must be Tried
Every living creature has the instincts concerned about their basic lifestyle. Sex, including one of them. So, less true if we assume that sex should be studied in advance so skilled at a later date. It is also prone to occur in those who have entered a period of engagement. Worry no fun when the first night so they would not hesitate to have sex out of place on the pretext that skilled when it has become husband and wife will be.

4. Sex Strengthening Relationships
Although sex is considered important in the eyes of men and women, but he is not everything in a relationship. The feeling of love was the one who can bind more closely a relationship and sex only complement it.

5. sex will be Mature
Level of maturity is not determined by whether a person has sex or not. Or if someone is a lot of sex or not. This assumption is wrong about this has been a lot of the youth plunged in the association free sex without thinking of the consequences. There are many things that can form a mature character in itself, one of which is responsible attitude.

When someone thinks of survival and endurance the chances are they’ll think of it in a physical sense, but in society today the concept of survival is a much broader topic. Many people will grow up hearing stories about brave adventurers who endured the harsh desert for 60 days or perhaps a teary love story about a sinking ship. However in reality, the real achievement is making it through the challenges of our everyday lives and living in hope that the future will bring a happier more peaceful world. Conformity is one of the key themes to modern day survival and plays a major part in how the youth of today endure society’s views and expectations to be what the past generations have once been.

As children, people are crowded with ideas and concepts of what survival is really about and many characteristics’ are based around bravery, strength and the term ‘trust no one’. People learn to focus on these particular strengths and in turn allow them to play a major role in the development of their character. It teaches people that as soon as their own lives become something of a challenge to act out in ways that may only really work in the brutality of our childhood stories. When in reality, people need to stop rushing around their busy lives and learn to face life with a new found hope for the future, and only then will people learn that enduring today’s modern  society really is the most admirable feat mankind has ever faced.

Another common, mislead conception is that the concept of conformity plays no role in today’s world when really it could be seen as the one word definition for the modern day society. These days life is all about having enough money to fit in, or finally getting that dream job, perhaps its partying every weekend or going on a massive shopping spree, whichever it is,  it all stems from mankind’s desperate need to fit in. Consequently the majority of people fall victim to the world’s materialism, rather than enduring the conflict accompanied with going against the crowd and simple living just to live. There should be no need for the fastest car or the best clothes, life should just be about the most important things such as passion. People need to learn how to survive the pressure of conformity and how to endure the world’s harsh views, because at the end of somebody’s life, it is not the material achievements that they are worried about but rather the relationships with the people they love and support. A different kind of endurance is necessary to overcome this pressure of conformity resulting in a true tale of survival.

It may come as no surprise that many of today’s youth are pressured into things they would not otherwise do, however some of this ‘peer pressure’ originates from the older and supposedly ‘wiser’ generations. All of a sudden expectations are placed upon somebody, they are told who they should become and how they should act. What happens if the person giving instruction does not know the harsh realities they will face in life? Do the youth then proceed to face life’s challenges, ill-equipped with the necessary characteristics and tools to survive? Life isn’t a fairytale and if all somebody ever knew of the world was pretty pictures and happy little melodies then what do theytruly living what must be seen as a remarkable turn to when reality hits? People are naturally drawn to the quest for survival. Such stories make one feel hopeful and amazed that someone has achieved such a broken adventure, to see them return stronger gives somebody courage in their selves, a hope that maybe if the need called, they too could survive such a thing. So why can’t the older generations be a better example, perhaps sometimes the sheer brutality of reality needs to be told to the youth so they can be prepared for what is to come.

Perhaps it is fear that drives people to live such lives, simply the thought of not being part of the crowd somehow forces them to live in conformity. However there are some that choose to endure life as it comes more so than others. Most people survive reality and its hurdles simply by falling into a sort of invisible-ness but some choose to boldly stand out despite the obvious pressure. This really is a true tale of survival, not some childish adventure but the story of how people overcome the fear of conformity and live in such a way that endures the cruel words of society. They have to live with harsh remarks and overlying pressures, but somehow they manage to inspire the lives of many and truly live what must be a remarkable story of survival.

 http://computersight.com/computers/virtual-reality-vs-the-real-world/

http://gomestic.com/consumer-information/how-to-clear-out-your-wardrobe-and-make-money-on-ebay/

According to experts, more powerful one’s memory when she was in her early age. The more young person’s age, the more fragile memory, so it is very dependent of the guidance of adults (especially parents).

For children aged 4 months, he was only remembering her mother’s face. After stepping 12 months, he started doing some new behaviors such as eating with a spoon hit the spot as well as with other objects. When the child is 18 months old, he began to remember things he used to do every day, such as bath time, eating, sleeping, walking, and so on. Children also have to remember where you move the object that he loves to another place (if at that time, he sees you move it), although in a long time.

After he was 2, 5 years, children are able to remember what he was doing that day, friends or acquaintances who often times he met. Ages 3 to 5 years, children are able to remember the simple rules such as if lost in a mall, he could come to the information. He also remembers not to cross the street alone. Children will also remember the things that makes it impressive or trauma.

Children older than 5 years, can remember more and more detail than in previous ages. He was able to remember the home address, telephone number (both home and mobile numbers of his parents), 1 to 6 tasks and how he can do it, the streets around the home environment, how to take care of pets (such as giving them something to eat and drink , invite them for a walk, and taking care of them if you’re sick).

The adolescent generation plays quite a major role in America’s future. This role is based on the jobs we will take on. The future relies on us, because we are to become the future leaders of the country, and we are to control the political, economical, and societal aspects. When our generation comes of age, we will have to fill in leadership positions, and take care of America. The “tomorrow” of the United States will be dictated by the teenagers of today.

            Perhaps the most important aspect of growing up is the major political responsibility that will come with it. In order to control the people and keep them happy, the politicians need to run a strong system of government that will protect and help the people, and keep the country strong. Positions such as president, vice president, senators, and etc. will have to be filled, in order to keep the country in working order. All of these leadership roles must be assumed by us eventually, and we must be attentive and hard-working in order to keep the big machine that is our country working properly. The upcoming political conflicts will be ours to take care of, and new laws will be ours to pass, in order to keep America functioning.

            Furthermore, although seemingly distant, our age band will eventually assume control of the economy. We will be the consumers, and we will become the working class. We will be the leaders of our economical standpoint in the world. The stock market, for example, will be in our hands. Prosperity will be expected, and depressions will be the duty that we must attend to. It will be up to us to keep the economy going. We will have to provide for ourselves and our families, as well as pay taxes.  The economy is a fundamental part of the well-being of America, and our hard work and consummation of products will act like the fuel needed for a car to run. We will be the gasoline for the automobile that is our nation.

             Moreover, society and all of its clauses will be passed onto us. This includes literature, media, music, and all of the arts. The creation of books, plays, etc. will be the responsibility of my generation. It is also our duty to care for the environment with global warming and pollution posing as two great threats that are seemingly progressing at an alarming rate. So far, the generations before us have helped to reduce fuel emissions by aiding in the creation of electric cars. Keeping with the “green theme,” we focused our attention on recycling, and therefore initiated special programs in schools nation-wide. Once we attain the level of power that is now in the hands of our elders, it will be up to us to keep ideas like these to be developed.

            Without our generation, the structure of our magnificent land will crumble. Without us, the government, and our support of the economy, and our population and ambiance would suffer, and eventually be no more. Our country would become a jellyfish; a spineless, brainless creature just floating around. The future of our country rests on the shoulders of our generation, and we are irreplaceable.

Rhode Island legalized medical marijuana in 2006, but Massachusetts did not. “We wanted to pair these two states because they have so much in common culturally and geographically,” says Dr. Esther Choo, assistant professor of emergency medicine at Brown University’s Warren Alpert Medical School and emergency medicine physician at Rhode Island Hospital.

Choo’s analysis used data collected from 1997 to 2009 for the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s annual Youth Risk Behavior Survey. The analysis involved nearly 13,000 youth in Rhode Island and about 25,000 in Massachusetts. In each state in any given year, the study found, about 30% of youth reported using marijuana at least once in the previous month.

In other words, while marijuana use was common, there was no significant difference in rates of pot use between the years before and after legalization in Rhode Island. “We found no effect of the policy change,” says Choo.

These results are consistent with a 2005 analysis conducted by Mitch Earleywine, associate professor of psychology at the State University of New York–Albany, for the Marijuana Policy Project. He found that between 1996 — when California passed its medical marijuana law — and 2004, previous-month pot use by ninth graders declined by 47%. That was a slightly steeper decline than seen nationally during the same period, and Earleywine found a similar effect in all of the medical marijuana states he studied.

Of the new study, Earleywine says, it is “very careful about potential covariates and looks closely at a couple of states across time in a way that my work didn’t.” He adds: “Of course, I’m delighted to see that their work confirms my previous report that medical marijuana laws do not increase teen use.”

Although legalizing medical marijuana may increase access for some, Choo notes that it is typically a very small population who uses marijuana for therapy — and these aren’t people whom teens are likely to emulate. “Whether they are taking it for pain or for vomiting control or appetite, this is not a group we think of as superinspiring for young people to take up their drug pattern. It’s an older population who is generally very ill,” says Choo.

It’s important to note that neither Choo’s nor Earleywine’s analyses have been subjected to peer review. Choo’s work was presented on Wednesday at the American Public Health Association’s annual meeting in Washington, D.C. She is planning to do further analysis, including data from additional states, for future publication.

But both studies are consistent with state and international data showing similar trends. Research has found that rates of youth drug use don’t correlate with marijuana arrests or, at the other end of the spectrum, total decriminalization of marijuana possession.

Could it be possible that associating pot with uncool old people and making it legitimate, rather than rebellious, actually deters use by youth?

I have applied for 50+ jobs since I started jobseekers in June. Over half of them never got back to me, the few that did told me I needed more experience.

I stayed on at school and I really struggled with my studies. So in order to do well I put all my effort into revision for exams. Not that it made much difference as I tend to panic during exams. When I was in college getting more Highers, I felt the lecturers were teaching the subjects in a way I understood and I was doing well. So I got a part time job at a small joke and gag shop in town, which was managed by my best friend’s dad. I was there for just 4 months before head office shut us down.

Then I went through a rough time suffering from depression, so obviously I didn’t apply for anything then. I mean who would want to employ someone who was trying to end their own life? No one. I didn’t start applying for anything till I felt I could handle it. IS that not fair?

I swear to the goddess the next time I hear someone say I need more experience I will explode. How can a teenagers get experience if no one is willing to let them try?

I mean I’m a fast learner and easily adaptable. I may be shy at first but once I settle in I’m fine. Who isn’t a tiny bit unsettled and intimidated when startng a new job?

Come on folks. When you are employing new people think about what they are like underneath the nervous exterior. Ask yourselves is it really logical to ask someone under 20 to have “more experience” when they’ve been studying their ass off to get good grades?! No.

So this is a plea to employers around the world. Give young people a chance.

Pay attention to where you are going!  Today I was hit, at a complete stop, having driven under the speed limit because it was a speed trap, I did not even come to a rolling stop this time, in a 25 mph zone!  Hit in the rear again, for no apparent reason.  Stay focused on the task at hand if you are going to speed through a 25 mph zone at least pay attention because you never know what is going to jump out at you.  I could have been a pedestrian.