Graveyard Shift and Accepting Your Job

I got my requirements done. And everything. I searched for a  boarding house to live in, a place that will be my home for one year. Luckily, fate turns its hands on me and I didn’t find any difficulties doing those stufffs. I moved in two days before my first ‘day’. Literally, it should be my first ‘night’ because my scheduled working hours is from 10pm-6am, weekdays.

I was not yet oriented but I almost got into how my work will go. So simple. Far from what I was actually expecting based on the company’s job posting for the position technical writer on the internet. Worse, this one, this job, is really not related and far from my course which is Electronics and Communications Engineering. When they knew about my course, one employee told me that I should have applied for the production position since I am an Engineering Grad. But my co-technical writer told me that I can continue this writing career if I want to. That there are also other companies that pay well for writers’ position.

Oh well, here I am again. Delving in to something that I am not really sure of. First was my course. Second is my relationship with someone. And now, my first job. How many times do I need to fall to climb up in to the right decisions? The truth is I never really learned. Even if I had think of the things I want for myself a thousand times, my decision always ends up with the thing that I think is best for my family, for my loved ones. Call this martyrdom, I don’t give a damn. This is the most practical and selfless choice after all.

I am the type of person who never stop until I get what I really wanted. But sometimes situations come so overwhelming and uncontrolling, they just give me no choice at all. And I usualy end with something like this. Or was I just too weak to fight for what I really want and I unconsciously tend to give up.

But I guess acceptance is really the key why I still stick to what I have now. Wether it could be the ‘relationship’ that sometimes really gets so tiring or whether it could be the ‘first job’ that I have just accepted a few days ago.  We will never be really happy if we always resist what’s happening in our lives. There may be so many things that we do not want to happen to us and would want the hell out of those stupid things. But everything is just a matter of acceptance.

Today, I have come to believe that everything happens for a reason. Letting things happen to you without any resistance does not necessarily mean that you are just going with the flow and you do not know what you really want in your life. But remember that changing paths for improvement is different from not having a sense of purpose at all. I believe that there must be a certain strong reason why I was brought to this particular situation or why I was given this kind of job and I am very willing to learn and discover that reason. I know there’s so much that’s waiting in here for me. All I have to do now is to be really grateful that He didn’t let me fall again this time and has given me a wonderful opportunity to discover my new self.